Thought-isms

NOUVEAU NUMERO DE CASA ANNONCES

2011-12-22T02:21:00.000-05:00

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VOTRE INVITATION AU SALON DU BATIMENT

2011-12-04T10:30:00.000-05:00

Madame, Monsieur,

Nous vous faisons parvenir, votre invitation au salon "LA SEMAINE DU BATIMENT" qui se tiendra du Jeudi 8 au Dimanche 11 Décembre 2011 à CASABLANCA au Centre des Expositions de l'Office des Changes - Route d'El Jadida.

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Ouverture du salon : De 10H à 19H

Imprimer cette page ou celle, ci-jointe, pour vous et les gens qui vous accompagnent.

Aussi, pourriez vous inviter autres personnes en leur envoyant cette invitation.

Lien du plan de situation du salon :

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Veuillez croire, Madame, Monsieur, à nos salutations les plus respectueuses.

LE DIRECTEUR GENERAL

Redouane BARGACH

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LE SALON INDUSTRIE

2011-11-18T11:34:00.001-05:00

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LE SALON DU BATIMENT - VOTRE STAND A PARTIR DE 7 650 DH HT

2011-11-04T07:35:00.001-04:00

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NOUVEAU NUMERO DE CASA ANNONCES

2011-10-22T07:35:00.000-04:00

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CHR EXPO - Le salon des professionnels des Cafés, Hôtellerie, Restauration et commerces

2011-10-13T10:28:00.000-04:00

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LE SALON DECO EXPO

2011-09-19T02:58:00.001-04:00

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Moving on

2011-02-15T13:08:00.002-05:00

I have started a new blog. As a college senior, it seems I am expected to be serious instead of philosophical. For now, it seems I am finished with this blog.

To you, Dear Reader, especially if you have stuck with me the entire way:

Thank you. I appreciate your prayers, well-wishes, and advice more than even I can articulate. I hope that this blog can serve you therapeutically, as you make your own journey through life. Maybe Thought-isms will be revived in the future, we'll see.

Until then, you can follow me on my "serious" blog, www.journelise.com. It won't be as flowery as this, but it will be as honest as I can make it.

Have a wonderful day, Dear Readers, and may you be blessed richly.

Yours sincerely,

Elise L. Arvidson

Luck, and the lack thereof

2010-09-16T17:48:00.003-04:00

Hello again, Dear Readers!

Have you ever found you are luckiest at your most unlucky? When everything goes wrong, but--for whatever reason--turns in your best favor at the culmination of unluckiness?

The strangest thing about "finding the silver lining" as they say, is not so much the grey-ness of the clouds, the looming forbearance, or even the rain puddles; it's the "finding" that's so strange. Consider: If the silver lining is invisible/ignored by all except those who seek it, so then are good details lost in a sea of unlucky sequence by all except those who choose to find it.

It is not unknown that I think happiness a choice--how else does one keep faith and fortitude when there is none to be had? He must choose to have faith, and choose to stay strong!--and therefore is completely independent of luck, or the lack thereof.

If I have an "off" day, then I am unlucky.

If I am unlucky, then my best efforts will be in vain.

If my best efforts are in vain, then I have cause to be unhappy.

If I have cause to be unhappy, I have no reason for "silver lining".

Notice I said "cause" not "right" to be unhappy. However:

If I look for silver lining, then I have hope.

If I have hope, my failures won't seem so bad.

If my failures don't seem so bad, I have cause to be happy.

Here is a list of my Silver Linings for the day:

1) Class schedule a mess: at least I'm still in school!

2) I straightened my hair today, so of course, it rained

3) I dressed up today, it still rained

4) I wore my glasses today. It rained.

5) I rode my bike. Rain.

6) I came back to my room, and despite the rain, I had a good laugh with my roommates about the Michigan weather before I wrote this post.

The funny thing is, it's not so bad that I had to practically change my outfit because I was soaked through--in fact, it made me laugh. Here I was, wearing my glasses, on my bicycle, with newly straightened hair and all dressed up, in the middle of a torrential downpour... What a sight I must have been! When I finally caught a mirror, the reflection reminded me of a wet cat. Cats don't like wet.

Why should I worry about the weather? Why should I stress about things beyond my control? I shouldn't. That's the plain and simple of it. I shouldn't.

Have a stress-free Thursday, Dear Reader!

STRESS!!

2010-09-01T14:10:00.002-04:00

Hello again, Dear Reader. I hope you are doing well.

As for myself, I am caught between everyone else's schedules, and in danger of severe breaking, in part due to bending over backwards. I'm not the best planner. That's just the simple truth of it. I can plan my hour; I can plan my day; I can plan my month, but I just cannot plan several months or a year in advance. The organizational complexities of such an endeavor elude me. And yet, I try very hard to plan things in advance, knowing that no matter the backups, my plans will blow up in my face.

Sigh.

I want so much for this year to go well. I won't even ask for smoothly, or quickly. I just want it to go well. I want to get my credits in and graduate from college. I want to set up a system for our student publication that can be executed after my graduation, and most of all, I want to get married. I want to be able to have a wedding on a budget, but still feel like I wasn't missing out. It's only a day, after all, but the effects will last for my lifetime.

I want to spend time with people I may never see again.

I want to help a friend who needs it.

I want to learn from a stranger what he thinks about the world.

I want to write a book.

I want to write more poetry.

And here I am, stuck between schedules, and government grants, and too few credits, and student bills.

How hard it is to have such big dreams, and so little movement. To know and see clearly what I want, only to turn down the path of what I must do.

I always survive. I'm tired of surviving; I want to live.

Dear Reader, are you shackled too? Perhaps if you can make it, we both can make it. It is better to learn our weaknesses and deal with them, than turning away and hiding. Carpe diem!

May you overcome,

Have a productive Wednesday.

A new Beginning

2010-08-29T18:44:00.002-04:00

Well, I've had a summer...

I'm all excited for the Pulse to start up again!

Dear Reader,

I am making a Beginning Anew promise: I want to blog more. If I consider myself a writer, shouldn't I write? I do, actually, just in pen and paper...

My world is so vivid and subjective. It moves, it grows, it contracts. How can a mind comprehend all there is in a single perspective? How much less can a mind comprehend all there is in several perspectives?

I feel small, but not insignificant. If I am made for a purpose, then I must accomplish that purpose sometime in my life. If I attempt this endeavor wholeheartedly, then I will accomplish everything I was meant to. If I attempt this endeavor without fervor, then I will only accomplish a portion of what I was meant to. Therefore, I was made for a purpose, and I must attempt that purpose wholeheartedly.

With such an ocean of expectation, it is easy to feel lost, isn't it, Dear Reader?

Remember my post on choice? I have as much a choice to be successful and to thus, fulfill my purpose. If I had no purpose, why would I exist? Everything has a purpose--even paintings are made to supply income or just as a hobby. The best course of action is to make a flexible plan, and try to follow it. By "flexible", think "willow tree" vs. "oak tree".

I intend to choose. I intend to give. I intend to discover, and I intend to live.

Have a happy Sunday!

Running hard

2010-06-28T16:43:00.002-04:00

Dear friends,

I am in the process of completing my résumé. For the fifth time, if I have the score correct. Unfortunately, I have been unsuccessful in my endeavors to find a paying job; college students are greater in supply than in demand. No matter, I will press on.

The biggest down-turn in this unemployment is that I have begun to take it rather personally. I know I shouldn't; I have a mom already, you know. But nonetheless, I have begun to feel rather... superfluous. Frustrating.

Why do I short-change myself? Is this an attempt at humility?

Have you noticed, Dear Reader, that there is a definable difference between humility and low self-esteem? I'll explain as best I can:

Humble people will be the first to thank you, and the last to say that they simply 'cannot'. They understand the limits of their abilities and skills, and the believe they are not any less important than the fellow beside them, nor any more important. Humble people are what some call "down-to-earth".

In contrast, people with low self-esteem are among the first to thank you, and the first to say that they simply "cannot". While they recognize their limits, people with low self-esteem will allow themselves to be compared to peers. These people make limits for themselves; they don't bridge them very often. A person with low self-esteem will make herself the butt of jokes, aimed at making light of her short-comings. While cleverly disguised as humor, it is a painful reminder of her inadequacy.

Hmm. I've given a more detailed description for a person with low self-esteem, I'm afraid. But wait, humble people seldom talk about themselves and are universally known for being "simple" to explain.

Well, regardless, Dear Reader, I have been working to keep my fears and self-doubt at bay. Because I know what a difference a small bit of encouragement can make. Please remember your friends and acquaintances, and remember to encourage them too. Hard times have always been made easier when two or more share the load.

Until next time,

Have a wonderful Monday.

Around the Bend

2010-04-20T19:56:00.003-04:00

What can I say, my friends?

It has been so long since our last conversation. Why is it that whenever I draw close to people, I find their goodness for so short a time before we are rent apart again?

The missions trip to Louisiana was an experience, to say the least. I invested of my time in the other group members and in the members of the community we were serving. What a release, to serve others so selflessly.

I've heard tell of the 5 Love languages. It's an interesting concept, though I must say, after reading some of the material, I certainly would not have guessed that I express love in acts of kindness. It makes sense now I stop to think on it, but two weeks ago? I'm not sure.

Odd (isn't it?), that cleaning a church bathroom, or setting up chairs, or sorting donated clothes could be considered acts of love. Odd that sitting with young girls at a table for dinner and just having a conversation is an act of love. Or trying a little bit of every home-cooked dish, thinking "Vegetarianism be darned!"

I'm back at the Arbor now and am especially tuned in to how I perceive--and give--love. It's nearly the end of the year. Have I made lasting relationships? Have I treated people as though they are individual beings and not just bodies? If I am able to see to the depths of others, what good is it to waste on frivolous relationships? On the other hand, how can I commit to so large a crowd?

I have striven for love this year, especially after returning from Costa Rica. Have I showed others that love I've discovered? I think I have. Actually, I certainly think I've tried. Perhaps this is the depth of my heart: in having one conversation, I will love a friend.

We are all about to separate. Why are we allowed so few moments in which we can truly connect?

What can I say, my friends? I have spent the last few weeks catching up on homework and loving people. Shall I be faulted in that?

I shall try to write soon. Have a wonderful evening.

The Eye of the Storm

2010-02-15T14:51:00.003-05:00

Hello, Dear Reader(s). I apologize for my silence; you wouldn't believe the enormous list of accomplishments I have effected within the last month and a half. Also, as I believe I've mentioned, I try not to bore you with redundant recaps of my day ("in a nutshell," as they say) or with general topics of life that have little or no bearing on my current state of thought. However, here I am, trying to get through a mammoth amount of homework, and of course, I couldn't concentrate. So, let's see:

Happy New Year's Eve!! I hope it was wonderful!

Happy New Year's Day!! I hope it was anticipated...

Happy Palindrome Day (Jan. 2, 2010)!!

Happy Math Addition Date (9 Jan. 10)!

Happy 1 year Anniversary of Costa Rica (13 Jan. 10)!

Happy February (1 February)!

Happy Groundhog Day!!

Happy Half-Birthday (2 Feb)!

Happy Math Addition Date (8 Feb. 10)!!

Happy Valentine's/Friendship Day!

There. I'm glad I got that off my chest!

I seem to be in the eye of the storm. I've had a whirlwind of activities before this week (the greatest of which caused it nearly impossible to complete my homework), and I'm just waiting for my life to be drowningly busy again. Sometimes, Dear Reader, I just can't figure myself out! Do I want peace and quiet? Do I want lots of free time? Do I want to be involved? Do I want to spend the majority of my time with others? Which is it?? I cannot attempt all these options at once...

Oh the Power of Choice! Blessed as I am with it, I am also able to abuse it to the fullest. It is devestatingly hard for me to say 'No' to a group or person. If I am outright asked to be a part of a group, I try to make up an excuse of how I really am too busy right now to join. I've been able to ward the vast majority off, but some groups are so persistent! It's such a blessing to have this free time now, but just as much a burden--there are tasks which require completion, and here I am, unable to concentrate and instead writing a blog. Motivation is not the obstacle; the obstacle is fatigue. I have been running on adrenaline of the next big event in my life, jumping from one lilypad of happenings to another. I have had very little respite since the beginning of January, and am still expected to make lightening fast turnarounds.

I should probably just take a nap. Clearly, I will be unable to function to my fullest capacity until I do so. However, I have such a laundry list of To Do items, I wonder that I'll get a nap at all today.

Sigh. The Eye of the Storm is an interesting place to be. You can see the flurry that you've come through, and you can see the flurry that's ahead. I guess all I can do is weather the storm...

A Year of Change

2009-12-14T16:34:00.002-05:00

Dear Reader(s),

Another year has come and is leaving, as we watch the snow pile up on the sidewalk. I can truthfully say this has been the longest year of my existence; a year I will remember for life.

I have grown in more ways than one, and I hope you have too, Dear Reader. I have learned many timeless truths, and become more convinced of the Truth.

This is a question and commentary on my life (and possibly yours), so I am willing to speculate: what has had the most impact on my future life?

Before I went to Costa Rica, my posts revealed me for what I was truly feeling: panic, insufficiency, and a confusion of identity. I learned to love people through that experience of total surrender. I no longer allowed myself to be insecure; I just dealt with the problems and happenings as they came to me. I immersed myself in the culture with its people and tried to emulate the same reactions, emotions, and perspective they had already. I came to understand many of my "unanswered questions" I had grown up with: questions about etiquette, about responsibility, about my life. Going completely changed me.

When I returned to the country, my posts again showed me for what I was: confused and frustrated. I had never encountered an experience that left me speechless before, and thus I was frustrated at my inability to explain myself, both to people who were genuinely seeking an understanding, and those whose preconceived notions threw me off my guard. I fought for a truth I had never believed or stood for until this point, and lost many times, all the while knowing that my experience had taught me this truth beyond refute. Returning completely changed me as well.

I've taken classes, and I've learned and applied new concepts to my life. I've learned and applied new relational techniques to my connections with friends, family and roommates. I have sought out people to have conversations, and I have sought out enemies to make peace. I have actually tried to set aside my personal feelings and fear of pain in order to love others in a way I believe Christ has called me to love them.

I hope this can be my legacy, Dear Reader. I hope you can read this, and you can agree. I also hope that by writing this, you will look at your own life, and find what has shaped you too.

I wish you well, Dear Reader, as the back cover closes on this chapter of my life: A year of Change.

What to say?

2009-11-18T19:49:00.002-05:00

No sé que decir.

I don't know what to say.

Is it better to speak without a voice, or remain tactfully silent?

Sería mejor? Would it be better?

Today I am tired, but able to switch languages without thinking. I, who am now fluent in two different languages can find nothing of importance to say. What good then, is my knowledge? If I cannot affect change, incite a revolution, persuade peers, or even defend my knowledge on the basis of reason within the confines of the two languages I possess, how will I ever find a voice to give a voice to others?

What makes a good leader?

Is it passion? Is it courage? Is it willingness? Is it servitude?

Of these qualities I possess ample supply. How then do I restrict myself from leading? I have things to say, people to lift up and encourage, peers to serve; what makes me hold back?

What to say?

What not to say?

Do I even want to lead?

No. I don't. I want to empower.

What to say?

I have nothing to say, and yet, everything in the world. It is important that I stress this.

I hope that I can use my my talents, my passions, my courage, my willingness, my service for others. To empower. To encourage.

Metamorphosis

2009-11-05T17:35:00.004-05:00

Again, I ask you, Dear Reader: when is a "level" of maturity achieved? Is this even possible? To complete a "level" of maturity? As beings, is it not true that we constantly grow? How then is it conceivable to reach any "level" whatever it may be?

"Levels" have thus been devised my mankind to measure itself and the world it perceives. Disagree? How many things can you, Dear Reader, name with its stages? Even the alphabet is leveled; we have the first letter, and the last letter.

If it had been given a conscience, would a caterpillar know it was changing inside its cocoon? With out ever having seen itself before, would it know?

Like a fish has no notion of being wet, so a desert has no notion of being dry. And yet, a tadpole will know both worlds, seeing as it starts in water and ends on land.

Metamorphosis: a change of the form or nature of a thing or person into a completely different one, by natural or supernatural means.

I'm a very passive person--to a point. I would much rather mediate a conflict with peace and honesty than I would argue my views and insist on my accuracy of fact. That said, I will speak up when I know I am right. I try not to do this all the time; no one likes a know-it-all.

I will speak up, and I will (quietly) firmly hold to my position. I believe a conflict is never "won" by the loudest combatant, and so I will give my views, but then allow others to give theirs. I don't like arguing opinions.

There is a Right, and there is a Wrong. This is not my opinion, it is fact. Just as there is light and there is dark, so there is a Right and a Wrong. We may put different things under these headings, but they remain opposites.

If we believe that there is no such thing as Right and Wrong, we fall prey to the worst kind of laziness called un-accountability, which allows us to do everything we want, whenever we want, without regard to any type of moderation. Moderation is key: I love sugar. I love candy. If I were able to eat candy all day long, and as much of it as I wanted, would it make me a better being? No, but I would have some nasty cavities to fill. Too much of a Good thing is always Bad. Therefore, there must be a Right and a Wrong way to enjoy the Good things of life.

If everything is left to opinion, Dear Reader, we allow others to mistreat us, insisting that the actions are a result of "his opinion" or "his upbringing", when in reality, "his" actions are Wrong. The idea that any one "opinion" is not more important than others' allows us all to develop great capacity for apathy. What is the point of arguing if, according to opinions, we're both Right? That said, why should we allow ourselves to be doormats for the sake of a personal view of humanity?

If humanity is inherently good, why don't we always do Good? Why do we know there is a Right and a Wrong? What is it about human law that separates us from animals? We may have instincts, true, but we can also act against our "instincts". What then? Do we blame the society and environment? If we blame the surroundings for causing our choices, we are not helping the problem, but furthering it! If I do not have the Power of Choice, Dear Reader, I am not human, but an animal with nothing more than instincts it cannot disobey. Such a view surely does not encourage civility, but dehumanization.

If all the creatures of Earth have evolved, and the highest form of evolution is Man, and Man's thoughts are not nearly his own but a random collocation of atoms, what makes Man greater than Beasts? What allows Man to act against his "instinct"? And further, what claim has Man over any basis of Fact, Truth, or Authority? If he is merely random, could he not also have developed improperly? What merit has he to say that we all came from one simple life form and not from another? What gives him authority to talk on Right and Wrong? Nothing. His words are meaningless strings of phonetic sounds, intended for intelligence, but ending in stupidity.

I ask again: when is a level of maturity reached? When have we changed? Do we know when we're changing?

Like all beautiful butterflies, we must first change from worms.

Silence

2009-11-05T00:38:00.002-05:00

Silence is hard. Sometimes, it's harder than speaking up.

Dear Reader,

Have you ever been a part of some sort of drama, theatre production, where (backstage) another performer has told a whispered joke, and instead of laughing in great guffaws, you must silence yourself to half-concealed sniggers, and choked gasps of air? Silence is hard.

Have you ever, Dear Reader, known that your suggestion was right, but were shut down by popular vote, and then been proven right through sheer circumstance, though you resolved not to push the issue? Silence is hard.

Have you ever walked into a room that stopped, mid-conversation, Dear Reader? Silence is hard.

Have you, Dear Reader, ever known another to be angry at you in silence? Silence is hard.

I try to encourage others to speak because it is a hard thing, to stand up for one's beliefs. However, it is even harder to endure the silence that follows.

How many things can be said in silence? How much more can be said in silence? What a power it is have a focused silence. Power enough to cause others to quake in their boots at a silence, or to impose the most uncomfortable restrictions lest one were to break the silence.

Silence is hard.

Why do we suffer in silence, Dear Reader? Don't we have friends to support us? Aren't we called to rejoice with those who rejoice and mourn with those who mourn? What makes us think we should suffer, then, alone?

No. This is the wrong type of silence. We should not suffer aimlessly and without support to come out of such mourning. It is an injustice.

Are there others around you, Dear Reader, who are silent? Reach out to them. I implore you, as I will also try to do. Regardless of my suffering, should I not offer my listening ear to another who is possibly suffering in silence? Stand up for those who speak with silence.

Good night.

Helping Hand

2009-10-21T12:35:00.003-04:00

Why do we even try to help people?? We often assume we can help, but are blinded to our own insufficiencies. Then we think we're right to help, and go on in a superior fashion.

No one asked! Keep your advice to yourself! If someone wants specific help, he will say so. It is not my place to assume I know what's best--Who am I to think I hold the benefit for humanity? What is in my background, my present, my life, my soul that I am so infinitely full of wisdom? What causes my personal perspective to be so desirable to speak? Why must I even open my mouth?

And then, of course, when confronted, "I'm just helping..." Helping whom? Myself?

People may be dumb sometimes, but they are not full imbeciles. If left to oneself, a person will either survive, or die trying. How insulting to speak to him as though he were a child! Or worse, to take him strictly literally, not allowing for human error, and then pointing out his humanly error as soon as he commits it!

What is the point of picking out another's errors? To help him? How?

Matthew 7:3-6

"'Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, "Let me take the speck out of your eye," when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye.

"'Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and then turn and tear you to pieces.'"

Stop assuming others are wrong. Instead, give others the benefit of the doubt that they did, in fact, have an intelligent thing to say. If we all have been given a brain, it is likely that we all have an intelligence. Therefore, use it for the good of others, and not to bring about personal gain and glory! How foolish it is to puff oneself up, thinking others admire, when instead they laugh and ridicule.

"The people you help should have a right to say 'We don't need you,' 'We don't like how you help us,' or 'Let us help you.'"

--Karina Vargas

"We can be judging by offering to help because we assume we understand another's needs, but we're not listening."

--Karina Vargas

Stop assuming. Listen. Speak sparingly.

Have a wonderful day.

October Thoughts

2009-10-02T16:59:00.002-04:00

Happy October!!!

It is now 5 p.m., and I am sitting in my dorm room while I write this. It has been raining all day, the sky is overcast, and my toes are cold. The wind is blowing outside; I see the large tree out our window dropping acorns like little bombs. My roommate is sleeping, and has turned out all the lights in the room except for my desk light. Ahh, Fall is here!

The leaves have been turning colors, and have been falling to the ground. Riding my bicycle has become (more) dangerous because of wet leaves and random bits of bark and acorns.

What is today? It is the second of October--what a day!! Why is this day special? Because I am alive today. It is special because I woke up and I could breathe today. It is special because I was able to bring joy to someone today. It is special because it has been made special.

Isn't that a thought? That this day is special just because it has been made that way? Why do we go through days one at a time? Because each one is special.

People often ask me my favorite time of year, and expect (I don't blame them in the slightest) that I will answer with "Summer!" But I'm not sure that it is. I like summer because summer is hot and gives me an excuse to spend time out-of-doors. But I also like winter because winter is pure and crisp, and when the snow falls like a thick blanket, the moonlight reflects off it at nighttime. I love winter. What about spring? Spring is wet and new; tiny seeds planted begin to take root and grow into flowers. Trees bud and flower, and everything with breath sings because winter is finally over.

This is Fall. Fall is clear, chilling air rushing down my throat; the smell of burning leaves, the colors of scarves, knit hats, and boots. Fall is miniature acorn bombs, and chattering squirrels.

Each season is special to me for its own individual reason. Liking all the seasons does not make any of them "the same as the others", just as liking the majority of people I meet makes each individual "un-special". I have been given the grace, and the gift, to see the Beauty of life, and to cherish it; the least I can do is tell others.

This day has no political, economical, societal, religious or theological significance (as far as I know). This is the day that the Lord has made; I will rejoice and be glad in it.

Have a wonderfully special Ordinary Day!

Time vs. Schedule

2009-09-30T22:04:00.004-04:00

Well, Dear Reader, shall we define "time" first or "schedule"?

Given the general consensus, schedule seems to be a measure of time. Ever since Personal Data Assistants became popular, more people find it necessary to "pencil it in" than they find to actually keep the majority of commitments made.

Have you noticed, Dear Reader, the block-like way that we now (whether forced to or not) organize our time? I have a little day-by-day timesheet of my classes, colored in bright colors per class per day. Where is it hanging? Where I can see it on my tack board. When I'm not around that little piece of paper with my schedule on it, I have trouble remembering which block of time I need to commit to next. Why can't I remember what I have given my word to? Is it so far from my mind to where I go because I'm just ready to be there?

Well, wait, if I'm ready to be, do I treat time differently?

Then what is time?

How can one define time? It has an end, as we are all told. Therefore, it must also have a beginning. But is time solely a measurement, or could it be that the idea of time is as abstract and incomprehensible to the human intellect as it would be if I were to attempt to paint it? Regardless, time is very nearly incapable of definition. We can "picture" time by drawing a clock, or something similar, but time as an existence? How to draw an existence?

I've just started reading Ecclesiastes, beginning with chapter one, title: Everything is meaningless. Great start for early morning devotions. Ecclesiastes also includes the famous "A Time for Everything" chapter (chapter three), which lists everything from emotions to work, with the same phrase.

Remember the previous post where I ranted (I did, and I apologize) about youth and apathy? Where I criticized being "busy" with nonessentials?

What is it about time that our culture defines it so differently from others? Where one culture will insist that time is "do-ing", others will insist that time is "be-ing".

Since returning, I have struggled with Task vs. Relationship. Or Schedule vs. Time. Here, I study grammar, mathematics, and theology. Abroad, I studied culture, language, and people. Both sets are equally important; however, to different cultures these two sets are unequal in value. If I believe in Task, I will set a schedule to make the most of my Time. If I believe in Relationship, I will have lots of time.

People should always be more important than tasks because they are people.

What are tasks? The schedule will always be full if we fill it, but Time can never be full until it has ended.

Looks like this post is long enough.

Youth and Apathy

2009-09-23T19:17:00.003-04:00

Dear Readers,

Thank you for enduring my ridiculous lack of commitment. I could regale you with a list of my classes, followed by a full detailing of my extracurriculars and campus jobs, but I'm sure you really wouldn't care to hear my excuses. Thus, we begin.

We had a really interesting chapel speaker on Monday, who, among other things, caused me to wonder about a common recurring theme I've only recently noticed among myself and my peers. Having visited three countries in the last six months, I remember hearing about things like the Nicaraguan revolution against their cruel dictatorships, or in Panama, the Kuna taking back their lands both diplomatically and by force. Or, even more recently, the Costa Rican students involved in city programs.

I'm not saying that here, in the United States, we are all lazy and uncaring; just that we are very apathetic.

Did anyone notice how none of the youth really cared about politics until the presidential elections last year? I heard nothing of state, provincial, or even of city elections all last fall. Granted, I was here in Michigan, but still--shouldn't there have been some sort of talk? After all, the president can only do so much for the states that they can't do for themselves.

It is the motivated who are actually doing something, obviously. What is it, though, that almost all of the people who care are abroad in other countries? Those who stay in this land to serve fellow countrymen are few and far between. The youth of this nation are apathetic.

When I went on my semester abroad, I became so relaxed and laid back. I absolutely loved spending time with people and talking to them face to face. I made sure to listen carefully and show others my true interest in what they had to say. Without cellphone, without car, without instant messaging, I discovered one of the greatest commandments: Love God, Love People. It made sense.

Coming back, I had to get myself motivated to a new type of busy. I came back to my computer with instant everything, my cellphone, and my dad's car. I had to try to adjust to people (for some odd reason) wanting to know everything about me, all the time, as soon as possible. The youth of this nation ARE busy. But we are busy with things. I'll be having a conversation with another student, when all of a sudden there will be a buzzing sound and the student will reach in his pocket, pull out some sort of communication device and--while texting--tell me, "Go ahead, I'm still listening." I find this extremely rude. Why have conversations with fourteen different invisible people and ignore the one person physically standing in front of you? Unfortunately, this happens all the time now. What became of common courtesy? When people talk to me, I try to look them in the eye when possible.

Perhaps it is because of our "conveniences" that we no longer care about current events. In a culture where everything is at our disposal--technology, services, information--we have everything, and nothing at all. How many of us actually take the time to Google all the information in the world? How many of us own every prototype of technology available and still get out to see the sun? How many of us take advantage of all the services available in our state in one fell swoop? Most likely? Few to none of us. The few ridiculously rich who can afford all the technology will probably prefer to learn about the "outside" world from the "comfort" of technology. These few will not have a definite "need" (at least in their own minds) to move beyond the shadow of comfort to experience because one can read others' experiences instead.

What motivates nowadays? Well, given the political/economical state of things, I would say that politics and economy are very motivating. At least, these are the subjects upon which every person has his own opinion. Why is this? Because we hear the most about politics and economy on the evening news. More, that we can find numerous websites, blogs, and columns with the "hottest" topics. Topics are only "hot" based on who says they're hot.

The youth of my country are apathetic. I try not to be, but it's an infectious disease, the type that is mind-numbing and pulpit-accepting. Of course, it depends who is numbing the mind, and who is standing at the pulpit. If it takes too much work to think, we tend to give up that chore--Remember the Power of Choice!!

For now, good night and a warning: Think critically about what you hear, and become motivated!!

TWITTER!!!

2009-09-22T16:38:00.003-04:00

Dear Readers, I apologize for not being a more interesting writer! I have been editing news stories for our student publication The Pulse, and have been trying to keep up with homework...

I have two topics I want to discuss, but alas cannot do them justice right now. They are: Youth and Apathy, and Time vs. Schedule.

I will write about these either tonight or tomorrow--sometime this week.

I have a Twitter now! Follow me at http://twitter.com/thoughtisms.

This is definitely the shortest post I have written.

Entering Adulthood

2009-09-14T14:05:00.002-04:00

School has officially started up again. I am taking 14 credit hours which (for some unknown reason) translates to only three classes. Actually, it's four, but one is an online class.

One of my misgiving upon returning to the same university after my semester abroad, was whether or not I would be accepted by the same people, or even come to acknowledge the same group or the same thoughts. Part of entering "adulthood" is supposed to be about finding my place in the world.

Right now, I am absolutely, 100%, completely, positively happy to be me. I feel better about myself enough that I don't mind if the same people I knew before don't accept some of my changes. I feel confident enough that I don't need their approval in the same way I did before. Going to another country again when I could understand the physical, social, philosophical and cultural ideas better has really improved my outlook on life. I had jitters earlier about not having the "right" ideas. It's okay now.

I mentioned in an earlier post about how I wasn't going to be dumb enough to post ALL of my personal thoughts online. Neither was I going to pick fights with others about unanswerable topics of religion and politics. I am just going to believe what I believe, as I plan to let others believe what they believe.

I still think that there is an absolute Truth, just as much as I believe there are relevant "truths".

I am still the push-over I was last year except for one difference: I am no longer a welcome mat. If a friend says X to me and expects me to take their opinion solely because they believe they are right, I will listen to their ideas, but I will not allow them to force me into an acceptance of X. In fact, I may just listen, accept their argument, but continue believing Y. I have a right to do that.

I'm finally getting the next piece to the puzzle of my life. I am starting to understand my boundaries and the boundaries of others. I am beginning to take into account something different.

It's weird self-analyzing all the time.

I must get to class!!

Have a wonderful day!

Remember Our Fallen Heroes

2009-09-11T20:23:00.003-04:00

Dear Readers,

Today is a special, somber day. Today, eight years ago, many thousands of citizens lost their lives in a terrible act of terrorism. Today, eight years ago, the World's eyes were opened to a different view, as commercial 747s were purposely flown into two of the Western world's most influential buildings. Today is the day of Our Fallen Heroes, the day of 9-11.

You were there, weren't you, on the day the towers fell?

You surely saw, didn't you, the victims who jumped to their death rather than be crushed by the upper floors?

With out a doubt, you too stared at your TV screen in shock, repeating "Oh my God."

When the people let out a great roar at the atrocities committed today, eight years ago, you let your voice be heard as well, didn't you?

As the rubble was cleared, you too were praying for just one more survivor, weren't you?

I was.

Every year, I wonder if people will remember, or if they will go on with their lives as if nothing had happened. Every successive year, I find that I am disappointed. I agree with what I said last year in the post "Reflections".

Crying won't bring back those lost to us. But ignoring such a sacrifice won't allow them to live on either.

Whether we had someone close to us, someone far from us, someone we liked, someone we disliked, someone we respected, someone we feared, someone we had never even lain eyes on, we all saw the planes. We all saw the towers cave in on themselves. We all saw the fires. We all saw the jumpers. We all saw what happened.

If anyone of us holds any life at all dear, let us remember the lives taken from us, and the lives given to prevent more lives being taken. Let us remember the brave firemen, the tenacious policemen, the absolutely admirable citizens like Todd Beamer and others. Let us honor them. Let us Remember Our Fallen Heroes.

It doesn't matter if we agreed with what happened or not. The fact that human lives were lost and their blood spilt because of a difference in politics or religion or thought is a crime unto itself.

God bless the families of those lost.

God bless the families of those taken.

God bless those who are fighting against such crimes.

God bless those who try to protect us.

And God help us not to forget them.

Good night.

Laziness vs. Willingness

2009-09-08T12:28:00.002-04:00

Today, it is raining. I don't mind; I like the rain when it's warm. But, I've noticed how the weather often affects my humor. And I say "humor" instead of "mood" or "emotions" because "humor" to me encapsulates my attitude, my state of mind, my emotional flux, and my aspirations.

Therefore, today my humor is a melancholy one. I am of a "happy" emotion; I am of a "thoughtful" state of mind, and today I have to force myself to stay focused.

I tried my best this morning, taking my new 12-speed bicycle around campus before it started pouring. Guess who left her umbrella in her room at home?

On days like today, I like to wake up early (which is weird for me) and take a hot shower while singing love songs at the top of my lungs. Then I like to settle into a corner by a heating unit of some sort, and read to my heart's content. I will often doze off during reading, relaxed by the sound the rain makes against my window. In essence, I wake up early to do...nothing.

I like doing nothing. It's comforting.

See?? See how hard it is for me to focus?? This is the most disjointed blog I've written for a while!! As I sit at my computer, drying off, my mind keeps taking flight on the most random of fantastical journeys. Even watching my goldfish swim around in his jar choking on leftover bits of his breakfast (it's really kind of funny because he swallows them, chokes, and they come out his gills) is cause for me to become lost in thought.

I don't consider days like today "lazy" necessarily, just "relaxed". I am willing to do my work and get things done, but it's really hard. The reason why I'm writing a post at all is because I have done everything I can up to this time. I'm going to chase people down for interviews come 1:30 because I can be sure that they'll all be in their offices again.

And I'm getting better at riding my bike. I'm still afraid that I'm going to run over a freshman, especially since I don't know what the rules are for bicycles on the campus grounds. I remember always jumping out of the way, so I think I'm allowed to cycle on the sidewalks. The streets go nowhere, so they're out.

Regardless, have a wonderfully raining day!

The Power of Choice vs. Happenstance

2009-09-02T12:37:00.003-04:00

Happy September, everyone! I hope this post finds you well into the swing of things, what with schools and all.

I like the word "happenstance". It's a good blend of "to happen" and "instance".

Today, I am a victim of "happenstance": I am in bed with a fever of 100ºF because I failed to close my bedroom windows when the temperature dropped to 40º a couple nights ago. Now I'm coughing up my lungs (and vast quantities of phlegm), I have a headache, and my nose is running a marathon...

I have been told before that I am a "morbidly optimistic person". I think that's a good thing. Of course, it depends on how it is said, whether applied gently, or thrown out. Regardless, I tend to see the positive in any given situation I am put in. It isn't always something I have to constantly remind myself of, but often a reflex action to the negativity around me. Sometimes, of course, it is very hard for me to be my positive self. In fact, sometimes, I absolutely resent seeing that same joy in other people.

I really don't like being sick--it's terrible! My mom confines me to a diet of toast and tea (which doesn't ever fill me like real food), and I have to lie still for large amounts of time. I could be doing something in that time!!! Today, I had such a headache and sensitivity to light, however, that I wouldn't have been able to do much. Taking a nap has had the greatest effect on me.

The Power of Choice vs. Happenstance comes down to this: What do I choose when things are beyond my control? I left my windows barely open--just to catch a slight breeze--and I got sick. I can't stop my body from getting a fever, just as I can't physically stop my head from aching or my nose from running. I cannot choose to be better at all (trust me, I've already tried). I just have to wait it out, and continue taking Ibuprofen for my headache. While I wait it out, it does no good to complain in a loud voice my trouble. No one else can help me.

Therefore, I choose to be positive, Dear Reader. I choose to rest and take it easy so that I get well before I have to move back on campus.

And of all things, I really hope my voice comes back because it's weird ringing a bell every time I want something I can't get myself...

Have a wonderful day!!

The Power of Choice vs. Expectations

2009-08-31T23:40:00.002-04:00

Good evening, Dear Reader(s). I'm trying to acclimate myself to the college schedule by writing this really late. Don't worry, I'll write my posts during the day once classes actually start.

I want to consider Choice vs. Expectations. This may be similar with the previous post of Predestination, but then again, it may be entirely different. That remains to be seen. However, I would like to start with a brief personal history: I am a different person. Or so I am told.

As long as I can remember, "being myself" has always set me apart from my peers. I like "different" things, I have a "different" background history, I have a "different" perspective on life. To me, being "different" is normal, in every unimpressive sense of the word. However, it is when I try to be different that I blend in with those around me.

Why is this?

Is it because so many people are trying to be different that they all end up being the same?

While in Grecia, Costa Rica, my host mom and her best friend had a Bible study and prayer time, during which they laid hands on me and prayed for me. After they had finished praying, the best friend looked at me and said that although she didn't know me, she knew that I would be a different person upon returning to my homeland. She told me that people who knew me before I came would marvel at my change.

I have no problem with either of those women; Neither do I have a problem with such a statement. However, I have heard proclamations like these made to me more times than I care to count. Many people tell me that I will go far in life, that I'll be successful, that I will change many things.

My issue is not with the people; one can always expect the old people at church to want to see me do well in life. My issue is with the expectation. By whose standards is "far in life" measured? Likewise, to whom will I be considered "successful", and who will mark my "changes"? The people-pleaser/obedience complex in me tries once again to usurp my independent choice by making me feel the absolutely overwhelming need to obey those proclamations so the people will think highly of me.

But thus begs the obvious question--How do I "go far in life"??? And, on top of that, what is needed to "be successful" or to "make changes"??

A very good friend of mine that I had the fortune of meeting on the semester abroad, told me that I was overthinking things too much. Sigh. I tend to do that a lot as well.

If I am worried about my Power of Choice, it still remains with me. I have to remember that these well-wishes are merely that, wishes. Suggestions. Old teachers expect me to use my talents to their fullest capacity, but cannot force me to do so otherwise, should I refuse. And to be perfectly honest, I should listen to others who have passed this part of their life already. They have many bits of advice of things they wish they would have done at my age, or things they should have avoided. I appreciate the help.

This post is the first of my pre-return-to-school jitters. School starts for me much later than most of my friends, so while they leave to attend classes, I stay here wondering if I have changed, and how much. Mostly, I wonder what my personal change will incite in others.

Dear Reader, it is late, and this is all my tired brain can comprehend at the moment. So, for now, I bid you good night because this post is long enough.

The Power of Choice vs. "Predestination"

2009-08-30T17:27:00.002-04:00

So, I put Predestination in quotes because I feel that there are many views of predestination out there, and I wanted a blanket term...

Some people believe that Predestination means that regardless of what we do, it has already been pre-recorded and filed away. In cases of after-life/soul salvation, it can mean that only a certain number of people have been called to "fill" heaven. Predestination can also mean that we, as humans, are mere puppets, never quite being in control of anything and following the course of our fate, much like a plastic bag floats on the current of a river. There are many different views to be taken into account. Can all of them be essentially right? Could only one of them be essentially right?

Who knows? I surely don't. And to be honest, why should I question that? I'll never discover the answer until either I find that I'm right, or I find that I'm wrong. There is no possible way to be sure that Predestination is or is not the right thing ahead of Death.

Continuing on the topic of the Power of Choice, I would like to point out (as I have done in the past several times) that we CHOOSE. This said, I must be clear that I find total Predestination a little hard to stomach. Maybe I'm an optimist--wait, who am I kidding? Of course I'm an optimist!!--but the fact that I make a Choice causes me to think that perhaps Predestination is like gravity: it can be bent.

If by the term Predestination, we mean that all of any given human's actions have already been pre-determined, then we must conclude that any given human has no choice over his actions that have already been forseen; he is merely following his Fate.

However, if we allow that any given human has the ability to take his situation/mood/happenstance into account and choose how he will act/react to it, then we must conclude that any given human also has the ability to control some small part of his life.

Therefore, Predestination could be true so long as it allows for Choice. In my opinion, anyway.

In direct relation to views of Faith, it makes sense that any Being who created a universe would invariably know all about the universe, its inhabitants, their nature, and their choices. Simply put: Even though God knows how I will act/react to any situation/mood/happenstance, he still gives me the Choice to act/react that way. I do not have to act any certain way. I can Choose it for myself. The idea that God already knows my action does not mean that I have no control over it.

Think of Greek legends and myths, for example. There are many legends where a prophecy was made to one or more of the main characters, who (upon hearing this prophecy) interpret it in their own way and act/react accordingly. The prophecies come true because the character was seeking to avoid or help or whatever. Had the main character chosen to act differently, would the prophecy still have come true? Maybe it still would have. The best example I have of this topic is a famous Greek tragedy called Oedipus Rex, to which I have posted the link here. Long story short, the King and the Queen have a son born to them, so they take the son to an oracle so she can tell them the son's future. The oracle predicts that the son (Oedipus) will grow up to kill his father and marry his mother. In fear the king and queen send Oedipus to live with a poor family and forbid contact with him. Oedipus grows up not knowing his real parents. He leads a revolt with the people against the king and queen, and upon victory, kills the king and takes the queen for his wife. He finds out later, though, that it is his mother he has just married. Which is disgusting. But the motif is clear: Fate vs. Freewill. Was Oedipus required to kill the king and marry the queen? That depends on the context: as an overthrower of the established government, yes, this was a very common thing to do. However, if he had known his true identity, one can surmise that he would not have killed the king and married the queen, already knowing them to be his father and mother. He was even made aware of his prophecy foretold at his birth, and believing his adopted parents to be his true parents, moved away so as not to fulfill this prophecy.

What a thought, huh? The tale of Oedipus Rex shows that even though Oedipus tried to fight against what was his Fate, he was still slave to it. He even made choices that contributed to the fulfillment of such a prophecy. In the end, he couldn't escape himself.

Maybe stuff is just going to happen. And maybe by trying to make my own choices I contribute to that which I cannot control. However, I still can make choices, even if they have a hand in my Fate.

And with that, I take my leave because this post is long enough.

The Power of Choice vs. Influence

2009-08-26T22:52:00.002-04:00

Good evening, Dear Reader. I would like to make a case both for and against Influence as it interacts with my newfound Power of Choice.

For example: Obviously, the Influence of other people in my life will have a direct effect on my choices. However, others' Influence should not be used as a scapegoat for my personal choices. The Power of Choice remains with me, and cannot be parted from me thus.

Way back in second grade, I remember it was popular to say "The Devil made me do it," in normal, everyday conversation of...well, second-graders.

"Johnny, why did you chase Amy?"

"The Devil made me do it!"

In hindsight, because we were young enough not to know too many swear words or curses, blaming an invisible object deflected responsibility from ourselves (especially when we weren't sure the type of attention we would receive for an action). Besides, blaming the Devil was certainly tantamount to actually cussing, therefore, we all felt very much grown up.

Truth be told, Dear Reader, I've often disliked the Power of Choice because it means if I am wrong, it will be on my head. I don't like to be wrong much. Hence the dislike. But, I don't have to let others Influence how I will choose. I can, but I don't have to.

I've realized lately how much my taste in music has been Influenced this summer, what with spending time with my best friend, with my godmother, and at the radio station. I now recognize at least one hundred new songs that I didn't know this time last year. What is it about music, that it can make and break people all over the world?? Does the music I listen to have a direct Influence on how I Choose to dress myself? how I Choose to speak? how I Choose to act? how I Choose to live? Some people think yes; it has often been promoted by these people how suicidal teenagers will kill themselves after blaring music with suggestive lyrics. Unfortunately, I have heard far too often this same story, and how the musicians of such lyrics should be ashamed of themselves for introducing these ideas at all.

Personally, I don't think such lyrics should be made public because they are suggestive. But at the same time, I know that those lyrics sell. Friends who listen to this type of music tell me that the artist is "expressing what I feel" through the song. Regardless, it remains the sole Choice of the teenager what he will do with the suggestions he is given in any type of music to which he listens. Especially when he tells me that he prefers to "just listen to the music." This is a mindless choice. Mindless in this sense meaning that Teenager Bob refuses to use his own grey matter, but a choice nonetheless.

In the same way, Influence (especially in music) can be a positive thing! How many times have I heard people say that they "love this song" on the radio because it makes their day better? And it is Influence that is single-handedly responsible for personality/behavioral changes in recovering addicts of various vices!

There is an Aesop's Fable about a crane and a flock of other birds. The Crane is a nice bird, and the Farmer and his family like the bird and tell him he is welcome to their house anytime. But the flock of Birds are unkind and destroy the Farmer's crops and his fishing net. The other Birds tell the Crane he can be in their group, and the Crane reluctantly agrees, and helps the Birds destroy crops and farming tools. The Farmer goes out to throw a net on the mischief-makers, and catches the Crane in the net. The Crane tries to plead his way out, but the Farmer tells the Crane sadly that he is the company he keeps.

It is up to the Crane to Choose how to behave: accept the kindness and friendship of a respected Farmer, or gain the acceptance and camaraderie of his peers who want nothing but trouble for others.

In short, the Devil can't make me do a thing I don't already choose to do. I can make my own choices and even choosing not to act is an act in itself.

Good night, Dear Reader. I hope you get a restful sleep tonight.

The Power of Choice

2009-08-03T20:21:00.003-04:00

My dear friends, family, acquaintances, the occasional web-surfer; YOU, Dear Reader,

I would like to write on a very perplexing subject. I wanted to write this on my actual birthday, but what with activities and surprises...well, I'm sure you understand. I have recently come of age. And so the obvious question: What do I choose as my lifestyle?

I've had many mixed reviews over the course of my birthday, some urging me to try alcohol and such while others warn me against it. Some tell me that these were the best years of their lives, while others caution me about having too much fun. It would be easy to say I would rather choose the path straight down the middle, but then it begs the question: where is the middle? However, this is my time to choose; the Power of Choice stays with me.

What a funny thing Choice is. We can often dress it up to look as though we had nothing to do with it. It still remains our Choice. Right now, I feel that there are so many Choices, but my mom assures me the most pressing to me at this moment will all dissipate in a few years, only to be replaced with other choices.

Sometimes, I hate choices. I dislike that either way I choose, I may let someone down, or lower their expectations of me. I'm a people-pleaser. However, I'm learning more and more that as infrequently as I make choices for myself, it allows someone else to take over a little part of my life. Perhaps, if I feel pressured in any way at all, it's because I've let so many other people have a say in what I do. If I don't take responsibility for my actions, then someone else will be blamed for them. Why should I surrender my entire life over to other people just to avoid making choices??

The greatest thing about turning 21 is that I am no longer limited to certain things because of my age. If I am ever out with friends, I can take responsibility for my actions in choosing to accept a drink, or choosing to deny it. For the most part, I will enjoy knowing I can choose whichever option I want. I have that power, that Choice.

I say it is a Power; well, it is! And yet, think of all the choices I have made in a day without giving them a second thought! Some people try to use other "influencing" factors to get out of making even the smallest choices, while others will use (or sometimes, overuse) those same influencing factors to get what they want out of life.

Here's what I see about choice: depending on the day, the hour, and general daily energy of a person, Choice is one part logic to two parts emotion, to one part reflex. Even the most logical person has some hidden meaning behind his decision, especially if the deciding factor triggers a past triumph or failure. Equally, in decision-making, emotion and reflex are almost completely attached to one another, and thus vary the most in this equation.

I have the Power, the Power to Choose. No one can tell me what I will choose. They can tell me how they would choose, and they can tell what they think I should choose, but I still actually choose in the end. What a gift!

I will write more on this later because this post is long enough!

Good night!

Preservation of Innocence

2009-07-01T23:42:00.002-04:00

Okay, so I obviously didn't come back after dinner. Hopefully, I've given you plenty of time to digest the first part of this thought, Dear Reader. Thus, I return with the promised factors of "Rules and their Influence" and "Actions vs. Reactions".

RULES AND THEIR INFLUENCE:

Reading in the book of Romans of the Bible, Paul says:

"Now we know that whatever the law says, it says to those who are under the law, so that every mouth may be silenced and the whole world held accountable to God. Therefore no one will be declared righteous in his sight by observing the law; rather, through the law we became conscious of sin (Rom. 3:19-20, NIV)."

Previously in this book, Paul was both justifying God's sovereignty and his right to punish. It strikes me as interesting, Dear Reader, that Paul doesn't consider the "law" as a burden, necessarily, but as a measuring stick by which one discovers good vs. evil.

Object Image:

Okay, growing up in my family, there are lots of things that were just expected of us--doing the dishes, asking permission to stay at a girlfriend's house for the night, calling when out later than expected--these were things I was used to. When I entered junior high and high school, suddenly these "expectations" became "rules", so named by my peers who insisted that they were "free" to go to a friend's house for the night without asking, or they didn't have to call because their moms just "didn't care". My peers came to pity me for the vast amount of "rules" under which I was allegedly suffocating. The thing is, I didn't see these as "rules" until I realized that very few of my peers shared the same upbringing. Thus, it was because of these boundaries that I became conscious of "Right" and "Wrong" in my house.

So, logically, "rules" have two effects: a positive effect and a negative effect. If, with our imaginary village (let's call it 'Stickville'), everyone grows up with the same rules, Right and Wrong in Stickville will be very clear. Anyone who disobeys rules like "Do not murder" will obviously be rejecting the law, and thus be guilty of a crime. This shows that the law was created to remind people of the potential 'evil/Wrong'. If, in Stickville, everyone grows up under each individual family's personal interpretation of the rules, Right and Wrong will be undefined. They will still be known, but they will be undefined. For the sake of argument, let us say that in order for our Stickville to retain its innocence, all residents must abide by the exact same law, and the exact same interpretation of said law.

Sorry, Dear Reader, but I'm tired. I didn't think this thought would take me so long...I'll have to finish it later.

Good night!

Running out of sorts

2009-06-29T17:26:00.002-04:00

This is an expression my mom uses every now and then. I don't think it's an actual idiom that people use around here, but my mom uses it nonetheless. I feel it very accurately describes my life from the last post to the present: AAAAHHH!!!!

Just had to clear my system. I'm great now.

Well, of the more random things I have to ponder, Dear Reader, I still have one more reflection from Kuna Island that I still haven't shared! My apologies! Next time, I'll try harder to keep my promises I make online. I will end up writing two posts today, if I can.

ORIGINAL STATEMENT:

"The Village"--When we were in Granada, Nicaragua at the end of the Nica trip, two students rented the movie "The Village" by M. Night Shamalan (sp?) from the front desk of our hostel to play on the television in the lounge. This movie presented me with an interesting idea that I have seen here as well: innocence. Can it be preserved if the community is separated from the rest of the world? In the movie, the community still had some problems. Here, the Kuna say that violence does not exist on their island. This also makes me wonder about rules and laws: how much is too much? And where to personal rights come in? Should the cut-off community listen only to its own rules in order to preserve the innocence, thus negating the rules of the world completely? What about humanity? Although we often have perfect conditions in which to preserve said innocence, would it still survive? It seems to me that our choices and actions would make innocence harder to preserve.

CONTINUATION OF THEME:

First off, any poor unfortunate soul who has not seen M. Night Shamalan's "The Village" needs to go right now to the nearest movie rental and rent it. Seriously. It is a thriller about a village in the middle of the woods, and everybody is afraid to go into the woods. (SPOILER) It becomes apparent that the creatures/monsters that live in the woods and terrify the people are really the elders dressed up in costume. They do this to keep the younger generation from falling back into the world. It's fascinating. I wouldn't ruin it like that, but I need the basis for this post, sorry. Still, go and rent it. I would buy it, but I know intellectual thrillers aren't for everyone.

So, the Kuna and Innocence. This was a purely objective reflection; the only way to continue the discussion would be based on personal perspective rather than facts or statistics. Therefore, the question is simple: If cut off from the "world" and placed in a closed environment, would the Innocence of Humanity survive? I'll make this harder by posing two likely paths of thought: If Humanity is inherently good, then Innocence will survive longer. And: If Humanity is inherently evil, then Innocence will not survive long at all.

I personally feel that every human is a little of both, like the whole ying and yang deal. Perhaps I am indeed an idealist, but I find it impossible to believe that even the hardest criminal in the world lacks a soft spot. It may not be big enough for anyone to reach, but it is there nonetheless.

However, once we have decided whether or not Humanity is inherently good or evil, the next question to ponder is which idea will spread faster, the good, or the evil. If, in our imaginary village, there are 7 'good' people and 1 'evil' person, and we have decided that good spreads faster than evil, then we can likely assume that the 'evil' person will, in some way, be converted after spending his life with the 7 'good'. Now let's flip it: If there are 7 'good' people and 1 'evil' person, and we have decided that evil spreads faster than good, then we can assume that the one evil person will have infected at least more than half of the 7 'good' after having spent his life with them.

More to come: Rules and their influence, and Actions vs. Reactions.

Dinner!

Notes II

2009-06-22T23:02:00.002-04:00

ORIGINAL STATEMENT:

Skirts/dresses--I love my sarong, and I use it every day. I still believe that pants are more practical, but I like skirts. Why do women use pants to work? Was it the the women's liberation that started this practice?

CONTINUATION OF THEME:

Truth be told, I can do so much in a skirt that I've always done wearing pants. It depends on the skirt, apparently, but they are really versatile. I can wear a casual skirt, change my shirt/blouse, and the skirt becomes business casual, or even semi-formal. Jeans can never be semi-formal--unless they are in pristine condition.

Perhaps you, Dear Reader, are familiar with the pictures of Rosie the Riveter? From what I've learned in U.S. History classes, the picture of a woman wearing overalls and performing a man's job while retaining her femininity was very appealing to women who were only house-makers up to that point. Once war broke out and the States joined in, the men were off fighting, but there were still many jobs to be done. The only resource available to employers at that time were women, who were strong because they raised households; women, who were strong because they were facing a lonely future until their husbands and brothers and sons came home.

The thing with the Women's Lib is this: the movement started (as they all do) because there was a definite need for change toward women's rights. Before the 40s and 50s, women were primarily devoted to house care. They cleaned. They cooked. They dealt with the children. They mended. They tried to make the husband happy. They tried to keep their kids from getting spoiled. Women had a heavy time of it. However, because of this stereotype, women weren't expected to achieve much else. Once they started working the men's jobs, they had to change their a-line skirts for pairs of overalls. This gave them more freedom.

You know, I really like a-line skirts. I agree with why the movement started. However, I humbly submit my thoughts on feminism today: If the movement started so that women such as I could go into the world and pursue any type of education, job, office, etc. that she wanted and not be told by the society that the said activity was not suited to her gender, then if I, as a woman who believes in choice, plan to be a home-maker in this world of business, I believe I should have that choice. Feminism was not started to control the world, but to create a semblance of equality. Will we ever be "equal" with men? I doubt it. But that doesn't mean it's entirely impossible.

Regardless, I really like skirts. Then I can be a woman who chooses because she has the power to make a choice, and not a woman who chooses because she thinks others have made the choice for her.

Good night, dear friends!

Notes

2009-06-21T14:56:00.002-04:00

So, I finally received the journal I wrote in for the Kuna trip, and wow!! I wrote so much. There is a section where I thought up topics I wanted to write about when I got back, but because I had to turn in that journal for a grade, I forgot what the topics were until I received it again and began to look through it. That said, I'll do my best to translate what I think I was thinking at the time... Also, I'll probably post one a day, just so I don't load down the family and friends who want a quick read.

ORIGINAL STATEMENT:

Poverty-- I have seen photos of people who live in houses like the Kuna with the label of "poverty" under the picture. The Kuna--they choose to live this way. This is not poverty. Also, why is it that we believe everyone needs to be as rich as we are? Although we have our riches and our privileges, we need much to maintain them. The Kunas work out of sheer necessity.

CONTINUATION OF THEME:

I believe I've already written about this (and if I say the exact same thing again, I apologize, although this is a point I feel needs to be stressed as much as possible). However, the fact remains: our greed and love of material wealth has very obviously caused the economic downfall that people in the United States are currently experiencing. Some have worked so hard for their futures, only to find it's the present that's falling apart; Others have worked so hard for their present, only to find they have no future. To look at it this way leaves me, Dear Reader, with only one option: our manner of thinking (that is to say, our manner of logic according to fluctuations of less stable factors like the economy and human nature) must have a flaw. Consider: If we believe that we are dealing our lives correctly in the world during this age at this time, then the world should either continue getting better, or should stay the same. If the world becomes worse off while we believe we are dealing our lives correctly, then something must be faulty with the original logic. This is how science class works. Make a hypothesis, experiment, draw a conclusion, and adjust your point of view on possibility. It's also "Cognitive Dissonance" all over again.

I would just like to add that I am not at all against hard work. I think that working hard is a very admirable thing to do, and I wish more people did it. My point is that our balance of work and play is off. If we work to sustain a perfect lifestyle, we may never enjoy our lifestyle to the fullest. The question comes down, not to work itself, but necessity versus greed. If we work out of greed, we will never have enough. If we work out of necessity, we will always have just enough.

This is a lesson I learned from the Kunas I lived with. What an honor to be brought into their world.

NEW JOB!!!!!

2009-06-19T18:08:00.002-04:00

Okay, so a good friend pointed out that I really haven't written anything about my summer, so here goes (and my family is sitting down to eat, so I'll expound more later):

I am interning with a local radio station in the downtown area. It's a rock/jam band station, catering to the musical needs of the "invisible generation" or Generation Jones (for those of you who are still confused, "generation Jones" is the wave of children brought up by the "baby-boomers"). It's fun; I'm learning so much about music and many things about live radio!!

My family is waiting for me, so I'll be back after dinner!

Weathering the Weekend

2009-06-10T19:22:00.002-04:00

So I'm feeling poetic... I thought the title was pretty darn good!

Wow! What a weekend! We had both my little sister's graduation open house, and my little brother's birthday party--To think that I still remember my sister way back when we were skinny little girls who played 'dolls' with every movable object in sight...Well, it was weird to see her graduate. And then my brother! I feel so old when I think about his age! Can it really have been this long?

Time. What a marvelous enigma to the collective human intelligence. Time has always been an awe-inspiring mystery to me. I wonder at the circle, and how I stand on the shoulders of other's whose 'time' was before my own.

They say that 'Time heals all wounds', that 'Time flies' or that someone has 'Good timing'.

I can't wrap my mind around a force that has existed for a long time, but not forever. Consider: Time has an end. Everyone knows that. Therefore, I reason that it must also have had a beginning. What was there before Time?

So much, yet so little. Time continues to stretch, but what happens after we leave this earth? Our 'time' is over. It's so little.

I'm tempted to post Hamlet's 'To Be or Not To Be' speech here. Okay, click this link, why not?

It's not that I'm feeling morbidly depressed or anything, it's just that I'm...dumbfounded. Hamlet (although he is depressed) has somewhat of a point: Time. What happens after we have served our 'time' here?

I don't know what I think, so I'll definitely come back to this later... However, I digress. I intended to write this post about 'Weathering the Weekend', and how I've found the easiest way to get through an event or occurrence in which I'd rather not participate is to hunker down and just do it. It was like that for me this last weekend. Oh, I have nothing against helping out my siblings, it's just that, well, it was a big hassle to do both in the same weekend. A headache I could have done without. But then again, they've always helped at my 'social gatherings' and whatnot, so I did the best I could to make theirs enjoyable as well.

Hmmm...

I must away.

Good night!

Thought-isms

2009-06-02T20:50:00.003-04:00

Let's be honest, you all knew this was coming somewhere. Just like those movies that you pick up from the library or the video store with the weird title that you watch so carefully until you find the title casually thrown out in the dialogue; or one of those books, where you spend half the chapters trying to figure out how it relates to the title at all... This is that post, where you will finally know what it's all about. This is that post, where I begin to make sense.

First things first, though: Happy June!!! My sister's open house for her high school graduation, and my brother's birthday party have coincided on the same weekend. Major headache to both, even though a congratulations are in order...

Also: This post is, in truth, late. I meant to post this yesterday, on the actual first day of June, so as to clarify my "hiding out for a month". I failed. Oh well.

With this in mind, I will now attempt to clarify my views on life, otherwise known as my "thought-isms" (come on, you have to admit that's a little creative...?):

GREEN:

Costa Rica is possibly the 'greenest' place I know. I'm sure it's due mostly to the overabundance of vegetation, the fact that land is spread out, and the 'cities' aren't as densely populated as they are in the States... When I returned here, I was utterly repulsed by eating seafood, pork, chicken... well, meat. As I've regained my bearings, if you will, I have discovered that I really do like salads better. More, that I can eat chicken if I have to, I can eat seafood if I have to, but I honestly would just like some veggies. This has come as a crippling shock to my parents, who can remember back to the time when I used to turn my nose up at simple peas. I still don't like green beans though. Weird.

Also, since being back, I have noticed the ingredients in foods and have started avoiding things with high fructose corn syrup (it gives me a stomachache anyway) and too many preservatives. I have also been trying (when I actually go to purchases) to buy things that were made from recycled materials, or things that were brought into the country by Fair Trade (not Free Trade).

STYLE:

I debated with myself (obviously) about putting in this category, but it seems appropriate, so now I'll explain. My style of dress before I went to Costa Rica normally revolved around jeans and collared shirts. My style of dress after coming back has consisted of hippie skirts, bracelets, glasses (I have very stylish frames, thanks to my Aunt Linda!), tank tops, sandals, and collared shirts. I've even gone through my dresser drawers and filled a large garbage bag with clothes that I no longer use or don't fit me. After the craziness of this coming weekend, I intend to wage the same judgment on my closet, and my two boxes of clothes in the basement. Having lived in almost utter simplicity in Nicaragua, and again in Panama, I really don't need the extra baggage. I took one suitcase on my trip, and one suitcase back. While away, I didn't even use all the clothes that I had brought. So, this tells me that I have been overly excessive in my life.

GOD:

This one was also a huge internal crisis for me. Long story short: God appears in many very unusual and mystifying ways. To define 'God' would be to put him in a box. And as a finite human, that is a very dumb thing to do, as it is obvious my tiny intellect cannot handle such a vast concept. Personally, I think that even if a person did not believe in an omnipresent, omnipotent, omniscient being, they would come to believe in one just by being with the people I had the extreme privilege to meet. And not always because the people I met were "Christians", but because they were completely and totally human. This level of interaction, and the honesty (or faults, as it may have been at times) left no doubt in my mind that these people were creations of a God. My favorite prof at Spring Arbor would corroborate my revelation, telling me I was seeing the imago dei, or the image of God in every person I met.

ME:

I'm okay with me now. Of course, many things have happened in the last month to make me okay with me. I have a better grasp of my many attributes and talents, and a better grasp of my faults. They are now a work in progress. I have accepted myself with both my likes/dislikes, my strengths/weaknesses, and my past/present/future, and I fully intend to move forward on this knowledge and self-reflection.

These were my biggest issues. With the help of family and friends, I have put into practice a theory I learned in one of my COM classes: Cognitive Dissonance. It states that where practice and belief come in conflict, either the practice will be changed, or the belief will be changed. Thus I have undergone a sort of transformation.

Perhaps I will touch again on this topic later. But for now, this post is long enough!

More Reflections

2009-05-17T13:12:00.003-04:00

Hello, friends and family!

I didn't realize how much of a following I had generated with my blogs until you all said something. Here I was thinking I was writing to a wall (what a concept, as my blog has 'posts'...), and all the time I was really reaching people. What an honor.

So, I'm still adjusting, whatever that means. And I'm trying not to scare my parents silly. Honestly. The unfortunate part is that it's becoming a full-time engagement.

Why is it that questions scare? Is it just that they face the unknown in asking, or is it more that the pressure is on to answer correctly? If I question the meaning of life, does that imply that I want to end my own, or can it be assumed that I'm purely curious?

I don't question everything, just somethings. I'm content with not knowing. There's a quote from John Stam on his second lecture to our class in Costa Rica that comes to my mind now:

"Maturity is being able to live with varying degrees of security. Immaturity comes from wanting to be totally sure of everything."

Do I agree? Well, in some way, the man has a point. Besides, how will I ever know truth if I don't question what I hear? I said 'truth' with a lowercase 't' because I meant it as a 'relevant truth'. How will I ever know?

One of the things that I've struggled with the most (and seriously, friends, I will probably use this same term for about thirty other things I have struggled with) is the concept of right and wrong. I believe that there is a definite Right in some things, as well as there is a definite Wrong. However, there will also be cases where a rigid judgment will not suffice. Then, of course, as a young individual with a spirit, I want to find the Right because I believe it is a good, sturdy, and moral thing to do. So I study. What I find in my studies confuses me, so I will come to question both my studies, and my previously conceived notions. What I gain from this (besides Experience) is Knowledge. Allow me to expound on my views of Knowledge: Adam and Eve wanted Knowledge. What happened to them? They died.

So now, it begs the question: Is Knowledge good? Is Knowledge Right? If, as a Christian, I can believe the Bible when it said that Eve wanted to be like God, so she ate from the Tree, and gave some to Adam, causing them both to sin, it can be clearly implied that Knowledge is Wrong. However, especially in the New Testament, the entire purpose of Jesus' sermons was Understanding. Are the two different, or virtually the same?

On a random aside: This is why I love language. Words mean things. I want to mean something when I open my mouth, or when I put my pen to paper, or when I type out a post for my blog. If I did not change something by writing, I wouldn't do it. If I could not help direct another person's thoughts down a different path by opening my mouth, I wouldn't speak. I choose every word carefully, hoping that you, Dear Reader, will gain a better view of what my message is trying to convey.

These ARE really random.

Have a nice day!

Questions

2009-05-10T21:27:00.002-04:00

Sigh.

The Questions have started.

"How are you adjusting back, Elise?"

"How was your experience, Elise?"

"What kinds of people did you meet, Elise?"

"Isn't poverty terrible? I'm sure you saw lots of that!"

What am I supposed to say??

"Adjusting is...difficult, because I'm struggling with the pro side to materialism..."

"My experience was life-changing because I learned how deeply I can love, and the chasm left by that love..."

"I met people in their own environments, in their own home, in their own culture, and surprise! They look like us..."

"I did not see poverty, however, I saw lots of people who were surviving, and people who chose their 'poverty' over something they felt was corrupt..."

I don't know if I'm ready yet, for these questions. Mainly because I feel my answers could be considered a 'burn', if you know what I mean, Dear Reader. And to be true, I've been asked the "How was your experience" question at least 5 times at church today, and every time, I came up with a different adjective. And, a different reason for that adjective.

In our "Re-Entry" workshops we did right before returning home, it was more or less decided as a group that we didn't want to shrink our experiences down to a word--what an insult that would be! And here I am, trying to find a sentence or two that conveys my extreme passion for the trip, outlines my experiences, and does justice to the people I met. Haven't come up with one yet, big surprise.

What's worse, every single time I see someone new who just discovered I was away for a semester (courtesy of my wonderful mother, who is just so excited that I'm back she wants to tell the world...) they ask the same questions. And every time they begin to ask, my stomach muscles actually tighten up with anxiety. I've never been prone to anxiety attacks in their formidable stages, but I really feel uncomfortable.

Regardless, I'm almost trying to make myself face people I know, because it isn't fair to them if I hide out for a month. But I'm trying to reveal myself one step at a time, and to specific people.

Hmmm.

Writing really does help; I feel much less conflicted in the mental area (although the emotional conflict continues to rage...).

I hope everyone has a wonderful night, and I promise, eventually I'll start writing happy again. Just, now, I need to analyze.

Good night!

Back to Reality

2009-05-05T10:40:00.003-04:00

Wow.

That's all I can say. Wow.

They warned us about "reverse culture shock". They even warned us that our newfound "truths" may scare our parents silly.

They forgot to mention, that my newfound "truths" would scare me silly.

What do I believe now? I'm still trying to figure it out. I have new views and old views on the poor, a blanket statement about economy, and I have inadvertently become very political. The thing is, I think I had many of the same views before; everything now is just an extension, or a detailed concentration of previous view holdings. Before, I was loathe to pick fights on everything I believed; now, I still don't like it, but I have a different view of silence that I didn't before. I'm not going to be dumb and pick fights with people on un-answerable topics, like politics, religion, and philosophy of life. I'm just not going to let others assume they can win me over. It really irks me when a person will throw out their viewpoint and then expect me to help them defend it solely because I may (or may not) support that view.

I'm a little hesitant about posting some of my beliefs here for two reasons: 1. because they are written, they can be taken out of context and used against me in ways I never meant them to be used (yeah, that hasn't happened before...). 2. This is the internet. I can only imagine what a future boss will think when he looks up my name and finds this blog. Also, no one asked. Even though this is my blog, I would rather write about readable things. Not topics that will cause a person to give an exasperated sigh before hitting the scroll button until the topic is finished.

Anyway, I digress: Now that I'm "home", I don't know how I fit in. My family is overjoyed to have me (they tell me so), but I don't feel like I belong completely. Remember in a previous post, I mentioned how I left a good half of me in Costa Rica? I feel that way especially now, now that I can no longer talk to my friends there face to face. I also happened to return as the rat race was starting the next heat--what am I going to do this summer?? Now I have to make plans to take classes, intern, get a job...the list goes on.

By the way, I hate taxes. They really ruin my happiness and sunshine.

I'll probably keep using this outlet to "process" as it was called by LASP.

Sigh.

I hate "To Do" lists, too.

Have a wonderful day! To all my English-speaking Tico friends, ¡Que Dios les bendiga!

Final Thoughts

2009-04-27T23:55:00.003-04:00

Dear Family and Friends,

I don't know what to say. I have lived with people, I have talked to people, I have eaten their food, slept in their beds, I have tried to see their world through their eyes.

What should I say? There is nothing that can express both the fulfilling happiness of being in Latin America, and the dizzying chasm of emptiness at the thought of leaving.

It's like I found my other half, here, where I least expected it to be. I am okay with myself now--more complete, more open, more accepting. I'll be honest, I've changed. I don't know what the change is, but I know it's there.

Everyone keeps asking me if I'm excited to go home. Home.
Yes, I am.
I also wish dearly that I could stay for just a little longer.

They say "home is where the heart is". I am torn. Where is my heart now? It is with the family and friends I will see again, but it is also with the "family" and friends that I may not see again.

I've been given much to think about.
I don't know how to sort it out.

I'm glad I have questions. I would rather not know what to do all the time. Sometimes it frustrates me that I know myself so well.

Home.

It's hard to meet people and then leave them.

Home.
Yes, I am happy.
Yes, I am sad.

Thank you. Thank you everyone who has supported me from the start. Thank you new friends, thank you old friends. Thank you family. Thank you for allowing me a glimpse of the world through your eyes. What a privilege I've been given.

I hate goodbyes.

Home.

We're flying to Miami tomorrow. This is my last night in Central America.
I don't know what to think.
I don't know what to say.

If only I could have both.

I'm ready. Again.

Thank you. Good bye.

Sincerely,
Elise Arvidson

Saying Goodbye

2009-04-20T00:28:00.003-04:00

I was able to meet up with some of our good friends from Grecia on Friday and Saturday. We went to the Jazz Café (really awesome!) and then visited a museum on Saturday.

It was so hard to say goodbye and walk away. If I could have, I would have enrolled for a year at the University of Costa Rica; this "meet-people-and-leave-them" business is taking its toll, especially with people that I could definitely consider being good friends with (P.S. When you read this, you'll know who you are!). I returned to the house in San José, and after having some soup, I claimed I was tired, went to bed around 5:30 p.m. and cried. I haven't cried like that since I came to this country, but I felt my heart breaking. Doña Isabel came into my room and told me that some friends from the youth group here in San José wanted to come and pray for me. I told her it was alright. I cried during that session too.

What is Love? The force single-handedly responsible for such close ties among strangers; for such connection. I love communication. I study communication. In my short time, I declare it is Love that causes and aids any sort of communication in this regard to studies. Love of culture; Love of difference; Love of people. Truth be told, I'm attached. I would love to live in Costa Rica. My host brother Esteban keeps telling me not to leave, because he'll miss how I laugh. Everyone else in my family tells me the house will be depressingly quiet because I won't be around to liven it up. Talk about guilt trips!

I tried packing today. Also one of the most depressing things I've done here besides cry. I actually searched the premises to find my possessions--I didn't realize I spread so much. I'm running out of space, and I'm considering leaving the family with something of mine, except that I'm such a light packer, everything I own (more or less) is something I need and use, and anything else isn't enough of me that I could leave it for sentimental value. Bother practicality!

We leave in the morning.

Please, pray not only for me and the group as we travel to Panama, but for the friends and families we're leaving behind us to do so. I won't be writing for the next week, so I wish everyone a happy week, and I thank you, Dear Readers, for reading.

Looks like this post is long enough.

Grecia, Costa Rica: Part III

2009-04-15T19:19:00.007-04:00

Okay, first off, so sorry that this is late in coming. Last week, I came to the internet café and discovered my email inbox was full with 36-some messages, at least 10 of which were sent by the Postmaster warning me that my inbox was full. Oh life.
Second, I just discovered this, but Blogger has a email inbox for me too: elise.arvidson.thought-isms@blogger.com . Cool. Please, for the remainder of the trip, if there are any questions, thoughts, comments or anything even remotely resembling feedback to my blog, please use the above address so that my school inbox isn't clogged all the time...not that I've gotten much feedback...
Third, I made it back from Grecia, and am in San José (also called San Ho by some in our group), and am going to be near a computer UNTIL MONDAY!!! Just so's you know.

Now, table of contents:
· Northamerican--Latinamerican relations and their strains
· 5 things I have learned about me
· 5 things I have learned about others

We're good.

RELATIONS:
One thing to remember in another country is that actions speak louder than words, whether the message sent was intended or not. Some of the "strain" of Northamerican and Latinamerican relations stems from both a disregard of the above, and limited mindset of the other culture/person/etc. Hispanic culture is very indirect, as I've mentioned previously. The meanings, the direction and the commands are all understood, but not necessarily expressed. Because Northamerican culture is rather more direct, often, a foreigner can seem rude, unsympathetic, and completely oblivious to social codes and implications. This, obviously, causes much stress on both ends unless each side is willing to be flexible and forgive. As a foreigner in this country, it would be my mortal embarrassment to offend my host family in any way, as they've offered me a home, food, and anything else I need. Therefore, although I have a direct manner in asking for something I would like (for example: going with some friends to a concert and spending the night over there since it will be late) I need to ask it as though it all depended on my host parents. I need to ask their permission even though I am of age, and everyone with me is a responsable adult like me. The way I ask is indirect. If I were to say "I am going with so-and-so and so-and-so to this-and-such a concert on Friday, and I will be spending the night," my host parents will likely feel as though I am taking advantage of their good grace to do whatever I please. They may also feel that by expressing this, I am hinting that I prefer the company of my friends I've known for a little while over the company of the family that is housing me. Does this make sense? A much pleasanter way to say the same thing is "Some of my friends and I wanted to go to this concert, but it will be too late to come home. We might be able to spend the night there, but what would you suggest?" This opens it up for the family heads to give an opinion and not feel as though I am taking advantage of them. Also, I am letting them know that I would like to be with friends, but respect the decision of their family. "Strain" is only the result of not trying to appease the other but stubbornly sticking to one's own ways.
Which leads me to continue...

5 THINGS I HAVE LEARNED ABOUT ME:
1. Patience is both my greatest strength and my biggest fault
2. I am a contextual learner. If I come across a word I don't understand, I listen to the context to get the bigger picture, and define words by their connotations in which I hear them used. This is why I've been having a mental block with grammar lessons, because each word is crucial.
3. I am very forgetful of little things, even when I try so hard to remember, but able to memorize passages of readings solely because I found them interesting.
4. I become angry when communicational flow stops, i.e. when conversation turns into monologue, or when discussion becomes argument.
5. I can look at the mammals/insects/reptiles, I can smell the mammals/insects/reptiles, I can get close to the mammals/insects/reptiles, but if they jump on me in any way, I cannot stand it.

5 THINGS I HAVE LEARNED ABOUT OTHERS:
1. Laughter is indeed the best medicine
2. Love is eating yucca casserole (even though you despise it) solely because your host mom made it just for you when you came home. Profound love is having two pieces.
3. Natives will often "use" a foreigner for "language practice", even though they know less of the foreigner's language than the foreigner knows of theirs.
4. Host families are like flowers: sunny smiles, showers of compliments, and fertil trust make the relationship grow.
5. Everyone has a limited point of view, because everyone has had a limited life. Therefore, foreigners will often be judged based on this view. Flexibility in all things is key.
BONUS
6. As a foreigner, natives either assume that the foreigner knows absolutely nothing about the native's culture, or that the foreigner is well versed in the lives, events and other random details of everyone in the foreigner's home country. We keep having to explain that the United States is much bigger than Costa Rica, and that it is impossible to know the lives of everyone else in the States...

Well, this post's long enough. I will try to upload my pictures tomorrow!
Have a wonderful evening!

Grecia, Costa Rica: Part II

2009-04-01T17:06:00.003-04:00

Hello again! I hope this finds everyone well and happy!

I have more -itos in the interest of time:

QUESTIONS:
It seems that Spanish-speakers must learn different nonverbal cues than English-speakers. One of my main ires is that I'm constantly unsure when I've been asked a question. I am actually listening to the sound of the speakers voice, and waiting for it to go up at the end to signal a question. No such thing. Or at least, not all the time. And when I ask if the speaker was directing their speech at me, the speaker will take the question as though I either didn't pay attention, or I did not understand a word. They will often repeat the "question" exactly how they did before, without the tell-tale nonverbal cue. Again, I ask if this statement they've made is a question. And yet again, they will try to explain it to me. The joke is this, I understand perfectly the words they have chosen to express themselves. What I don't get is what they are expecting as a result of these words!! Oh well.

FINISHED SENTENCES:
Also, along those lines, it appears that people who live within the same regional group and see each other for most of their lives don't finish certain sentences. Not all, but many. And yet, everyone born in the same region understands perfectly these partial thoughts. It helps to keep in mind that Spanish is a high-context language, where few words are needed to effectively get a point across. However, because I am a contextual learner, I need the context to understand.

PREPARED ANSWERS:
I find it easier to speak in Spanish about something with which I am very familiar versus improvisational speaking. This is very natural for learned speakers.

SAYINGS:
One of the sayings most used that I've heard in Grecia is "¡Que espanto!" which literally means, "What a scare!" It is used like the expression, "Oh for Pete's sake!"

GRAMMAR:
Also in Grecia, I've noticed that most of the people use the verb acordar as a synonym for the verb recordar. This is unusual to me because I'm used to acordar having a connotation of putting one's mind on something, and recordar having the connotation of only remembering.

OVENS:
The kitchen's hidden cookie jar (when not in use).

GAS STATIONS:
There are service gas stations here, meaning, there is no such concept as "self-serve".

SUGARCANE:
Sugarcane here grows in fields like corn grows in Indiana. And the smell of the molasses when the cane is burned in the graneries is overpowering--it smells good in small amounts, but not all at once.

DOORKNOBS:
The only doorknobs I've seen in this country are generally on the front door. All other doors have locks that slide.

I'm out of time!! Next time I'll expound on Northamerican/Latinamerican relationships here in Grecia. We have some stories to tell...

Have a wonderful day!!

Grecia, Costa Rica: Part I

2009-03-25T17:32:00.003-04:00

Well, since I wasn't able to write about Nicaragua entirely before coming to Grecia, sorry, but I'm going to save that for later--remind me!!!

One thing I'm going to say about Grecia is this: foliage. Holy cow, I didn't know there were that many different plants in the world, let alone one province of a country...

BUSES:
In San José, all the buses have only two columns of seats going from the front of the bus to the back. There are two seats in each row with an aisle down the middle (except for the very back of the bus where there are five or six seats along that far wall). Here in Grecia, it seems that every bus I've ridden has two columns of seats, but with three seats per row on the left side of the bus. And golly, does it get crowded.

KETCHUP:
It's amazing the number of food possibilities that open up to you when you stop using ketchup as only a condiment and start using it as a sauce... It's not that bad either.

SALAD:
Here, there seem to be two different types of salad, just like in San José. One is the salad that most northamericans are used to, the kind with lettuce. In Costa Rica, the Ticos shred raw cabbage. It gives the salad a little extra kick. Especially when topped with mayonaise and ketchup.

I would like to explain what I'm doing here in Grecia for those of you who don't know: I am working at a local business doing whatever jobs they have for me to better practice speaking. I am actually working in a private school's bio lab testing samples of soil from all over the world, and sending them back. My first day, the gentleman in charge of my work didn't arrive for a long time, so I cleaned everything. Not so hard. I have classes Tuesdays and Wednesdays at the church, but work Mon, Thurs, and Fri.
My host mom is so nice! She practically begs me to eat, so I oblige...

I'll have to write more later--I'm in an internet café and can only afford an hour at a time...
I miss you all!

Nicaragua: Part III

2009-03-19T16:53:00.003-04:00

So, more -itos:

GRAFFITTI:
Amazingly enough, it's in Managua too!!! And also amazing, it isn't just graffitti, it's propaganda. Everything from the youth comments in red, black, or whatever color, to the pink and yellow posters of Daniel Ortega's face, with slogans like "With God, we can overcome" and "You see, Sandino? We've made it this far!" While I don't oppose a personal faith, many Nicas think that Ortega is only using God to get a leg-up. Apparently, his beliefs weren't so prevalent the first time he ran for the presidency. But no joke, the propaganda is everywhere. The posters were starting to remind me of George Orwell's 1984 and "Big Brother". It was creepy.

ABORTION:
Illegal in this country too, but unlike Costa Rica, there are no provisions for rape or in cases where the mother's or baby's life is at stake. Critics say Ortega implemented this new law to get more support from the Catholic Church.

MURALS:
None that I saw, except for a Catholic church we visited. The shape of the church was circular, and in the 80s the church leaders wanted to express the history of Nicaragua through a faith perspective, so they had two artists paint a mural on every panel of the circular walls. Fascinating stuff.

After staying in the Centro Nehemias until Wed. 4 March, our group was splitting up to go on the home stay trips. I was with a group leaving at 4 a.m. for one of the most remote parts of the Nicaraguan campo where we would most likely be cut off from all modernization. I'm not exactly sure how I was arranged in that group; I remember saying I would rather a town, or something in between the two... Either way, I made sure my things were packed. I must clarify: the entire LASP population of 47-some students was split into "town" or "campo" home stays. Among those, we were 12 smaller groups, based on the proximity of the families with whom we were living. For example, I was in group #1 with three other students whose families lived near mine and went to the same church.
I woke up at the right time, took my shower, ate breakfast, and left with the group to go to the bus station. I started to feel nauseous on the school bus though, which is weird for me because I usually only get motion-sickness during the day. As soon as we got to the bus yard, and I got off of the bus, I felt instantly fine, which is also weird. We crossed the yard, and no sooner had I put my foot on the bottom step of the bus taking us to the campo, I felt oddly sick again. I thought it would go away, so I climbed up slowely with the other students who were busy finding their seats. I got half-way down the aisle, when I realized that I wasn't going to make it. I was somehow able to communicate this to one of our teachers who was standing right next to me, and she ushered me off the bus through the back door, where I promptly lost my breakfast next to a small palm tree. The teachers were going to send me back, but I didn't want cop out, so I insisted I was fine. I re-boarded, but all the seats were taken except for the front. I sat there while we waited for the bus to leave (it was still boarding passengers). That's when I started feeling jabs of pain inside of me. They would come and go, and although I really wanted to go on the trip, the mounting sharpness scared me: I did not want to be infected with some sort of bacteria and not know about it! I admitted defeat. My teachers took me off the bus and called another to come pick me up at the bus yard so I could go with the last group of students leaving for the "town". Once off, I felt instantly better again, although that feeling was quickly replaced with shame and terror. Shame because it made me think I could have made it, and I was unwilling to try, and terror because I would be sitting in the public waiting area before dawn while everyone I knew left me behind them.

It turned out all right though, but this is where I stop (it's like a chapter book, isn't it?) because this post is long enough : )

Nicaragua: Part II

2009-03-19T16:04:00.009-04:00

So, we were discussing politics.

This is Nicaragua's flag:

It was adopted in 1971, according to this website. With the creation of the FSLN (Frente Sandinista Liberación Nacional), Nicaragua underwent a major civil war. The Sandinista Front needed a banner under which to march:

The group was started by Carlos Fonseca against the Somoza dictatorships. Like I said, there was a war. When the FSLN's candidate Daniel Ortega won the presidency in 1984, it was declared a victory of the Revolution. After Daniel Ortega's first term, he ended up losing 3 consecutive times. It was after the third, legend has it, that Ortega actually asked a Northamerican interior designer what was wrong with his approach to politics that he wasn't winning. The designer thought it was the colors of the FSLN flag Ortega sported on his platform--the colors were too bold. With that, Ortega changed the "official" colors to a baby pink and Easter yellow. They can be seen on all propaganda signs throughout the city. (Please visit this site for more Nicaraguan political flags).

______________________________________________________

UPDATE: There is also a theory about Ortega's wife, Rosario Murillo, being the cause for the change. Murillo is well known for her jumbled theology that mixes the teachings of Indian Guru Sai Baba, the teachings of Jesus Christ, Gen. Sandino's personal philosophy, and some native indigenous beliefs. According to the theory, she suggested the change to pastels because they channel positive energy.

_______________________________________________________

After Ortega won the presidency again in 2006, a small group of Sandinistas broke off of the main group. They call themselves the Movimiento Renovación Sandinista (MRS), or the Sandinista Renovation Movement. Their new colors are orange and black, but I couldn't find a picture on the web...

Led by Dora María Tellez, who fought as a guerrilla in the FSLN, the party protests Ortega's presidency, saying it is becoming a dictatorship.

This post is long enough! Next up: more -itos!

Nicaragua: Part I

2009-03-19T14:42:00.005-04:00

Whew! Here I am! Sorry this has been so long in coming--I'm still getting lots of homework that's due the next day...

The first thing I thought when our land bus (the TransNica line) arrived in Managua was "Wow, it's hot." I loved it. For once, I could actually feel my fingers and toes...
We were picked up by some sort of a school bus from the bus station, and were driven to a seminary-type place called the Centro Nehemias. The Centro was affiliated with several church groups and Intercultural relationship organizations, and we stayed there because they encouraged international travel. Very nice place. Because it was evening, we divied up the rooms and went to bed.

The next day (Tues), we had a charla (a short lecture) and went sight-seeing a little in the bus from the Centro. Nicaragua is very political.

POLITICS:
The Nica government has suffered many uprisings and has been overthrown many times. The general timeline of important events can be seen on the BBC website timeline (we were given this article to read, and I was able to recover it online as well). But, here's a passage you might find interesting:

Independence:
1838 - Nicaragua becomes fully independent.
1860 - British cede control over the country's Caribbean coast to Nicaragua.
1893 - General Jose Santos Zelaya, a Liberal, seizes power and establishes dictatorship.
1909 - US troops help depose Zelaya.
1912-25 - US establishes military bases.
1927-33 - Guerrillas led by Augusto Cesar Sandino campaign against US military presence.
1934 - Sandino assassinated on the orders of the National Guard commander, General Anastasio Somoza Garcia.
Somoza family dictatorship:
1937 - General Somoza elected president, heralding the start of a 44-year-long dictatorship by his family.
1956 - General Somoza assassinated, but is succeeded as president by his son, Luis Somoza Debayle.
1961 - Sandinista National Liberation Front (FSLN) founded.
1967 - Luis Somoza dies and is succeeded as president by his brother, Anastasio Somoza.
1978 - Assassination of the leader of the opposition Democratic Liberation Union, Pedro Joaquin Chamorro, triggers general strike and brings together moderates and the FSLN in a united front to oust Somoza.
Sandinista revolution and US subversion:
1979 - FSLN military offensive ends with the ouster of Somoza.
1980 - Somoza assassinated in Paraguay; FSLN government led by Daniel Ortega nationalises and turns into cooperatives lands held by the Somoza family.
1982 - US-sponsored attacks by Contra rebels based in Honduras begin; state of emergency declared.
1984 - Daniel Ortega elected president; US mines Nicaraguan harbours and is condemned by the World Court for doing so.
1987-88 - Nicaraguan leadership signs peace agreement and subsequently holds talks with Contra; hurricane leaves 180,000 people homeless.
Post-Sandinista era:
1990 - US-backed centre-right National Opposition Union defeats FSLN in elections; Violeta Chamorro becomes president.
1996 - Arnoldo Aleman elected president.
2000 - FSLN win Managua municipal elections.
2001 November - Liberal party candidate Enrique Bolaños beats his Sandinista party counterpart, former president Daniel Ortega, in presidential election.
2002 March - Opposition Sandinista party re-elects Daniel Ortega as its leader despite his three consecutive defeats since 1990.
2002 August - Former president Arnoldo Aleman charged with money laundering, embezzlement during his term in office.
2003 December - Arnoldo Aleman jailed for 20 years for corruption. A year later he is transferred to house arrest.
2006 April - Free trade deal with the US comes into effect. Nicaragua's Congress approved the Central American Free Trade Agreement (Cafta) in October 2005.
2006 October - President Bolaños unveils plans to build a new ship canal linking the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans.
MPs approve a tough new bill that bans abortions, including in cases where the mother's life is at risk.
2006 November - Ex-president Daniel Ortega is returned to power in elections.

Please note that these have been copied and pasted. I've also omitted some facts that were irrelevant to this post. For more information, check the link above.

I am off to eat lunch. I will continue to write afterward.

TLC or CAFTA, Part IV

2009-03-01T19:19:00.004-05:00

I warned you it was long.

With dear Mr. Solís, I felt that some of his points were similar, and that he was, in effect, repeating himself. Whether this was for emphasis, or completely inadvertent, I still felt as though I was being talked down to. Granted, most of the students in my class (myself included) had little knowledge of the workings of TLC when he spoke to us, but I felt he should have given us more credit. I also thought it was unfair to blame solely the president of the United States for the "failures" of U.S. foreign policy. I know enough about my government to comment that even if the president himself were sensitive to cultural issues, or "culturally conscious" in my own words, any plans he has still have to go through the Senate and the House. As I also know, having watched the previous battles on television from the confines of the den in my house in Indiana, the Senate and the House may not want to work with each other, much less the president. This is our democracy now, and it's a shame. It seems, most unfortunately, that the party wants only its party agenda pushed. There is little cooperation, and even less listening. Also, who ever heard of a democracy that only has two voices? Why are only the Republicans and the Democrats in positions of power? I congratulate Ottón Solís for the first recorded break of a bipartisan election in 2002, but I took into account that it should not be solely the president's "fault", if you will, for the entire government's inability to function within itself.

Whew. I hope I haven't just been targeted by the CIA.

With the U.S. Embassy, once again, here are my initial impressions: big, shiny, imposing, impressive, far away, a show, and big, again.
Question 1) why is the Embassy so big? I've seen the Nicaraguan embassy, and the Mexican embassy, and the Peruvian embassy, and know what? They're about the size of any office building.
Question 2) Why is the U.S. Embassy so far away from downtown Central??? I pass the other three I mentioned twice a day. All three. The U.S. Embassy was an hour and a half bus ride out of the Central. It takes me 20 minutes to get to the Central. 20 minutes.
With the actual lecture itself, I just have to mention the type of people that came to speak to us. David Hensen was, ironically, a white, elderly, male. Could we underline stereotype any more? Nothing against him, it just struck me, I guess. Also, Ms. Martinez was from New Mexico (she told us) and she dressed like the Costa Ricans, in a nice skirt. She had the blending thing down, but it was most likely her background that had this influence. /Jill/ struck me as a woman who had probably been in some sort of armed forces because she held a strong stance, with her legs apart, her hair was pulled back in a bun, and she was wearing a very practical white shirt with a vest and dress slacks that were stretchy. With the way the trio kept emphasizing the protection of U.S. interests overseas, and their obvious dislike of Solís, I wondered about how many groups they had come in who were anti-U.S. I felt like everything they said was in defense to accusations never accused. The entire lecture held the undercurrent of "we get the bad rap, but we're nice people" and "everyone blames us because there are many anti-U.S. feelings right now because the Costa Ricans wanted CAFTA to pass"... Honest, I tried to be objective. I really did. But this is what I heard. I talked to other students afterward, and got similar feelings, so it wasn't just me.
Here's why I went on my rant about democracy: "Consensus means everyone has a voice, but sometimes nobody gets heard." --David Hensen
I couldn't believe he said that. To me, it sounds not like democracy (as it should be) but the same "rights-endangering" oppressive governments the U.S. denounces.

I would like to post the First Amendment to the Bill of Rights here.

"Congress shall make no law respecting the establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free excercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press, or of the right of people peaceably to assemble and petition the government for a redress of grievances."

This Right only guarantees that Congress cannot tell us we are wrong to practice a certain religion, or speak out against the government, or even print things that are happening. We have the Right to ask our government to listen to us. Listen to us. What about each other? This Amendment says nothing about listening to each other.

If CAFTA is the best thing for the countries of Central America and the Dominican Republic, why was it formed in Washington? That's where the countries all met--in Washington D.C. Also, why does the U.S. want to trade more with these countries? If anybody is to blame in the U.S. for the unemployment rate, it's the corporal companies and not the president. They're the ones that outsource to get more hired hands at a cheaper price so that the people of the United States who have so much money to spend can continue to save that money to spend it. The U.S. economy isn't working right now, and we're seeing that. People are also blaming this downfall on greed. The quote from Ottón Solís, "We want telecommunication to be a social tool, not a profit-making industry. Why can't you respect that?" I agree with him on this point. If the sole purpose of capitalism in the United States is to make a profit, it switches the emphasis from success to gain. Who is truly successful, and who is truly a failure? Are success and gain so intertwined they cannot be separated? I don't think so. We need to separate them again. I have listened to others' opinions and researched this. Now I have made my own opinion. All you can do is listen, or not.

TLC or CAFTA, Part III

2009-03-01T18:34:00.003-05:00

First things first: Happy March!!! Also, happy birthday to my dad. I won't be near a computer for your birthday either.

DEMOCRACY:
What is it?
My Webster's dictionary more or less defines democracy as a government ruled by the people, giving them equal rights.
In Costa Rica, there is a socialist democracy.

I would like to make a distinction: there are only two main forms of government on the earth right now. However, there are at least 6 different types of those two main forms.

The two main forms are democracy (a government ruled and supported by the people) and an authoritarian government (one ruler; also called a "reign" or a "dictatorship"). With these main forms, once again, there are three main types: communist, socialist, or capitalist. In case some of you have not taken an Economy class, a capitalist economy (in theory) is where the market is not necessarily owned by the government, but driven by the "invisible" forces of supply and demand. There is also a private ownership of the means of production, an open free market, and unlimited earnings.

A socialist economy is the opposite: public control of the market, market is government regulated, and earnings are limited.
Communism is the "ideal" result of socialism worked out, where there is no state, there are no classes, and there is abundance for all.

Why is it that so often, democracy is only associated with one type of economy? In today's world, what is democracy, and where does the definition come from? From what I've seen from interviews, most people seem to think that the United States defines democracy. Now the clincher: are the United States a democracy? That's the question, isn't it. Are the United States even a capitalist economy?

Please understand, I'm not trying to ruin anyone's view of the United States. I am merely attempting to point out that if there is one specific definition of democracy, it should not be necessarily defined by only one country as the model for all others to follow. Also worth asking: does a democracy truly allow other views, or only those that allow it to stay a democracy?

I've heard many students slam rules. Correction: many young people my age slam rules. The truth of it is, we need these rules. Without them, how do we define our boundaries? This is why the form of democracy practiced in the United States is not democracy in its truest form because if everybody's ideas were allowed to hold, there would be chaos. Also, the capitalism practiced in the United States should be defined as more of a "mixed" economy, because there is obvious government intervention and a limit on gain.

One of the young lawyers I got to interview for my final paper (and by the way, this was actually my subject for my paper) said that democracy isn't necessarily about getting one's views heard, it's about listening to everyone else's. Democracy should be about listening, he said. If I, as a citizen of the United States think that my First Amendment Right gives me license to say anything and everything I want to, I am sadly mistaken. Rights are a privilege, even if I've been born with them.

I'm putting my reactions in the next post because this one's long enough.

Random again

2009-02-28T23:26:00.004-05:00

Sorry, I spent my computer time catching up on Facebook. Like I said earlier, only high school to college-age students would dream of posting their personal thoughts on a wall. Seriously.

I just thought I'd shout out to my Grandma--Happy Birthday Grandma! I won't be near a computer on your birthday, so I'll say it now!!

Also, people go to bed way early here. That's probably because the sun sets at (no kidding) 6 p.m. on the dot. I timed it. We've also had some trouble on the street perpendicular to ours--a few neighbors have been jumped. I wouldn't mention anything, but I feel it's fair: if you don't read any new posts after about two weeks, you'll know I was kidnapped. That should help you sleep soundly.

Sorry, it's a terrible joke. However, tomorrow, I will write on Democracy, and my personal thoughts of both Solís' lecture and the Embassy field trip.

Have a nice evening, and don't worry, I can run really fast...

TLC or CAFTA, Part II

2009-02-27T17:38:00.004-05:00

At the U.S. Embassy in San José, Costa Rica, we were lectured by three different personnel; David Hensen, a Ms. Martinez, and a third lady whose name I was unable to write down quickly.

Martinez started the group off by asking us to give our definitions of an Embassy, and what we think the U.S. Embassy's main job is. We gave several answers, but Martinez clarified that the U.S. Embassy seeks to "protect the U.S. interests overseas by being U.S. representatives." She admitted that many anti-United States feelings make her job harder. Also, because this Embassy is overseas, it is their unique job not to make the U.S. Foreign policy, but to implement it. She continued with a list/ratio of workers hired at that specific embassy who are U.S. citizens versus the number who are natives. She urged us to check the government website on this matter.

David was next, and he outlined the four pillars of the embassy: Security, Democracy, Opportunity, and Prosperity. He said the embassy was helping the Costa Rican government, but there were nuances in how to approach the ideals of the country. He said that the workers at the Embassy wanted deeper engagements with the region, but that they had very high expectations for Costa Rica and thought the country would stay cooperative with them.
He told us that Costa Rica wanted CAFTA, as was shown by the 51% vote positive. However, Costa Rica "does things differently", and even though they were under a deadline, Costa Rica almost didn't make it to passing CAFTA. However, "the voice of the people was heard" and Costa Rica accepted the trade agreement. He also felt that the economy was becoming more open with CAFTA, and that this trade agreement would really help Costa Rica in the long run. David felt that Costa Rica's infrastructure was not as good, and cited that only 30% of Costa Rican roads are in good condition, which explains why the leading cause of death in the country is auto accidents. He also said that the ports on the coasts are very underdeveloped and need to be run by privatized companies. Also, at the ports, there is only 3% of water treated, which makes the beaches bad and spreads sickness--a negative effect on tourism.
David described the way that CAFTA was ratified in Costa Rica. It went through a 4 step process:
1) Negotiations--all the reps of the countries involved met in Aug 2004 to discuss "free trade" and the terms of such an agreement.
2) Ratification--all the reps returned to their countries with the skeleton of the agreement, and it was decided by a public vote. All citizens of age were shown both the pros and the cons and asked to vote on the agreement. CAFTA passed in Costa Rica 51% yes to 49% no.
3) Implementation--once it was passed by the public, the government of each country put it to a vote to pass legislation to allow it to proceed or not. All of the countries passed it.
4) Entry into Force--the agreement is now a law, and it is allowed to start in the countries that passed it.
According to David, the advantages of Costa Rica is that the country now has almost tariff-free access to U.S. exports. The U.S. is also able to help monitor and prepare the other countries to trade with each other, and it can improve labor standards. David told us that many blamed the U.S. for interfering before the public vote because one of the U.S. ambassadors went around giving his side of CAFTA. David felt that the U.S. was not using any illegal practices, but using the same methods as Costa Rica with Canada and Panama with their ambassador. He blamed Ottón Solís for the bad press, saying that when the U.S. ambassador came to do a press conference, the date was canceled. Instead the ambassador took his opinions to the people. When Solís wanted to reschedule, the ambassador was unable to make it at that time, but Solís insisted on that time anyway. When the ambassador didn't show, but was replaced by another, Solís said that the first ambassador had hidden because he didn't want the bad press. The "bad press" came anyway, according to David.

The third lady (and here, we shall name her Jill) reiterated the idea that the U.S. policy is designed to protect democratic space. She felt that Costa Rica could improve and learn how to opperate better in terms of democracy. She defined the difference between free trade and fair trade: free trade limits tarifs on imports and exports, while fair trade supports the equality of workers, responsible use of the environment, and responsible disposal of waste. Of course, she mentioned, you can always find stats that favor different ways. /Jill/ was unable to explain the difference between CAFTA and NAFTA (you'll recall that Solís said they were exactly the same), but said that CAFTA would help Costa Rica with its exports. The two greatest exports at this time are not bananas and pineapples, they are microchips and medical equipment.

All three encouraged us that if we liked being abroad to go to work for the government as ambassadors who protect U.S. interests overseas. More information about jobs here.

Tomorrow, I will write about Democracy, since it seems to be a common theme here. Also, my group did our presentation with my political cartoons! I was honored. Hopefully after my rant about democracy, I will write a post about my reaction to the CAFTA/TLC thing.
Have a wonderful day!

P.S. Here is a link to my pictures from the Limón trip to present!!

TLC or CAFTA, Part I

2009-02-23T17:44:00.003-05:00

Hi! I have returned! I'm actually working on a 7-page paper right now that's due tomorrow at 8 a.m. so I have decided to take a break (I'm on pg 4). Also, our entire group will be going to Nicaragua this weekend and staying for two weeks. Please do not be alarmed if I write nothing. I will most likely have no access to the internet. I am bringing my camera, and golly gee I will visit the volcanoes!!!!

TLC, or CAFTA:
Central American Free Trade Agreement, in Spanish, Tratado de Libre Comercio, was instituted by the offices of Washington D.C. to better trade with the 5 Central American countries (Honduras, El Salvador, Nicaragua, Costa Rica, and Panama) and the Dominican Republic. In CR, there are only a few companies that supply electricity, gas, internet, and communication for the entire country. But they have low prices.
The biggest issue it seems is the cell phone price. Right now, in this moment, at department stores, people can buy a cell phone for the equivalent of USD 2, and pay about USD 7 a month for service. Even less for only text messages. Many worry, however, that with the "penetration" of the TLC, big companies looking to make a profit will take the money. Not that it's that much, but if the big companies start selling their cell phones at a lower price, it is natural (given the laws of supply and demand) that the people will buy phones from foreign countries who can raise their prices as soon as other companies are out of business. This is what Rockefeller did with the oil in the 1900s.
Also, why should Ticos pay other companies? They have a good product at a good price with a system that works, right now.

We had the honor of being lectured by the leader of Costa Rica's Partido de Acción Ciudadano (PAC) political party. He ran for president of the country in 2002 and got third place, the first time in history that the bipartisan election has been broken. Ottón Solís feels that, especially with TLC, US foreign policy methods are outdated. He gave 8 reasons for this, but I was only able to write down 7 (I think this was one of the many days one of my pens died). Here they are:
1) US foreign policy reacts to current events already in motion, instead of anticipating them
2) US foreign policy documents tend to describe, thus, the situations and not the causes. This is not an analysis.
3) US foreign policy diagnostics tend to ignore economic model issues
4) US foreign policy tends to have a "black/white", "enemy/friend" approach to the acceptance of its policy
5) Policies tend to ignore tensions and political views
6) Policies are pushed as though whatever suffices in the US will suffice for everyone else
7) Policies tend to take into account only the short-run view, and not the immediate consequences.

In my own eloquent style, Solís is more or less saying that the US is trying to cross the culture gap without a bridge. He also feels that a) CAFTA is exactly the same as NAFTA--read one, you've read them all, and b) the previous points are a clear demonstration that US foreign policies are not tailored to fit the individual country, but formed in Washington D.C. and enforced abroad.

Here are some random quotes from his lecture:
"Soldiers fight for freedom of democracy, but at the same time, this takes away the freedom for a country to build its own economic model."

(On TLC) "We want telecommunication to be a social tool, not a profit-making industry. Why can't you respect that?"

(On Latin America's "inability" to maintain non-corrupt leaders) "Corruption is not an issue of Latin American politics; we live in a culture of corruption."

"I get myself to believe that the problems [of US foreign policy] were a product of the Bush administration because it is easier to believe it will change [with the next administration]. If I were to say, 'This is a running problem of the US,' then I am blaming an entire country, which is bad for all negotiations. We need to have diplomacy when we assign problems."

Okay, back to work for me. But I will counter this opinion above with what we heard when we visited the US Embassy.

FINAL DAY OF ICADS!!!!

2009-02-19T15:36:00.003-05:00

Today is a momentous occasion. Today is the last day of my Spanish classes. For a final project, each student has to speak for 8 minutes on a topic of their choice (that relates to Costa Rica) and use a visual. I'm waiting for my turn--I'm second-to-last in my group, and really, I'm not nervous. I used the excuse of a visual to map out my points. I can totally do this.

I just wanted to mention something random.

YOU, YOU, YOU ALL, and YOU:
When I took Spanish in the States, we are only taught two forms of second person: second person singular and second person plural, tu and ustedes. Or, you and you all. There are two other forms of you: you formal, and you friend. More or less. In Spanish, those two are the vosotros form and the vos form respectively. I was generally taught that usted or ustedes is used formally for someone older or someone you've just met, or someone you respect. The form is very informal, used for a friend or someone younger than oneself. I was taught that the vosotros form is used only in Spain, a relic of the Reina Valera period Spanish (like 'Old English', Reina Valera is 'Old Spanish'). The vos form is new to me; I never learned about it in school. It is used everywhere here in Costa Rica, and it is reserved for good friends one's age. And the verb conjugation resembles the tu form and has accents like the vosotros form. It's weird, but is sounds cool when used correctly. I want to learn! Also, here in Costa Rica, everyone uses when talking to one another, regardless of age. It's almost indecent to use the tu form unless one is angry.

Like I said, random.
When I return, I will expound on the ideas of TLC. It's long.

Blessed

2009-02-15T16:34:00.004-05:00

Yes I am. Really.

My host family is so loving to me--I joke around with my brothers Edgar and Esteban, my host father always gives me a hug, my host nieces Raquel and Camila take an interest in what I have to say and try to include me in what they're doing. Camila has recently started reaching out to hold my hand when we walk to the store with doña Isabel, and just after lunch today, my host mom told me that every day she thanked God that I was the student he picked for her family because I'm easy to live with and quick to learn. She teased me about being able to eat nearly everything she puts in front of me (which is something new to a family who has hosted many North American students), and how I ask so politely when I'm confused.
I'm so thankful that when I drew from the family lottery that God wanted me here to be a blessing to this family. What they'll never be able to fully understand is how much of a blessing they are to me!

By the way: Happy Valentine's Day (or Day of Friendship in Costa Rica)!

More hard work

2009-02-13T21:08:00.004-05:00

Golly, I hate homework. I hate it. That's too bad, huh, seeing as I'm a study-abroad student...
This week, they gave us just as many papers as the last week, and a few mini oral exams. I actually like the oral exams because I can pick a subject and run with it. I'm good at that.

I've noticed some more -itos that I think will be interesting:

GRAFFITTI:
Seriously, it's everywhere. And it looks like graffitti is mostly found on walls without murals. I've only seen one mural with graffitied writing on it. Maybe the young people are respecting other artists...? Regardless, the graffitti was one of the first things I noticed coming to San José. You can really tell a ton about the city you're living in if you pay attention to the graffitti. For instance, I kept seeing phrases in Spanish like, "Costa Rica, say NO to TLC!" or "Costa Rica doesn't sell! NO TLC!" along with the frequent brush paintings of former president Bush's face with devil's horns, or Mickey Mouse ears (this one really confused me). I also see many phrases denouncing Oscar Arias, CR's current president, with all sorts of explicit suggestions of what should be done to him for "giving in" to "TLC". Thus, the conclusions I draw solely from the graffitti is that 1) TLC must be some governmental manuever, 2) the young people (since it is assumed that generally high school to college-aged students would dream of posting their personal thoughts on a wall) disagree with TLC, 3) the US government must also be playing a part somewhere, and 4) the current CR president has angered the youth either by his involvement with TLC, or with Bush. I never knew graffitti to be so political! And yes, now I know the "full" story behind the graffitti, which I must unfortunately save for another post. It's long.

U.S. EMBASSY:
My culture class took a "field trip" to the U.S. Embassy on the northwestern side of San José. I was a bit peeved that none of the teachers told us we would have to pay our own fare, as I just had enough for that day and today. Now I'm in debt to two girls and my host mom until I can get more money from my card. Oh well. It's life...
The Embassy was huge, with perfectly manicured lawns, and guards, and huge iron gates, and no pictures allowed. None. The guards confiscated cameras at the entrance.
Maybe I was really sensitive, but it bothered me--all of the big-ness, and the high security, and the fact it was out of the way of the city, up in the mountains, and in the rich part of town.

GAYS AND LESBIANS:
As I'm sure many of you may have guessed, there are few gays and lesbians in CR. Nonetheless, I have seen couples, and they are usually in the younger generation. There aren't too many in the 40's and up generation from what I can tell.

ABORTION:
It's illegal in this country, except for extreme cases where death of the mother or of both would cause a doctor to recommend an abortion. The illegal clinics where abortions are done are hard to find and expensive.

CHILDREN:
Nearly everybody loves little children here. On the buses, if a lady gets on the bus with a cute little toddler in tow, the other passengers will talk to the child and tell him/her how cute they are, or how strong--baby talk. I have never seen that in the U.S. Ticos will also talk to any children and baby talk them.

Okay, I am (in the words of my host brother Esteban) "Mucho cansing"--from muy cansada which means very tired. It's a made-up Spanglish term.

Good night!

Coffee

2009-02-10T20:05:00.003-05:00

Today, my culture class took a field trip to an organic farm. These types of farms are becoming more popular in Costa Rica as more people try to "save" the Earth from impending destruction. However, this farm was cool. The word for "farm" is finca, and generally refers to agricultural endeavors.

The owner of the finca, Roderic was really smart about how he planted his farm and kept animals. Unlike conventional coffee plantations that we've seen as a class, Roderic worked extra hard to make his product good.

I haven't explained the plantations yet, have I? So sorry.
Coffee plantations (and banana plantations) are basically hectares of land with one type of plant. We got the eco-friendly version of the negatives, the biggest of which is that these plantations use up the nutrients in the soil without putting any back since they are monocultures. Also, these plantations force the plants to produce the same fruit under extremely unnatural conditions for that plant. For instance, the coffee plant is a shade-loving plant, but on the plantations, it is sown for several hectares without an ounce of shade. The reason the plant is still able to survive is because of the bug-repellant chemicals, the nitrogen-enriching chemicals, and the one that protects the leaves from sunscorch. Plantations are sown in a way that makes it quicker for the product to ripen, and easier for the workers to gather the crop. Organic production is not that way at all.

On Roderic's farm, he planted many trees and other bushes with his coffee plants. He keeps a dog, two goats, two sheep, and a horse so he can collect their manure, which he keeps in a compost building. Usually, compost is kept in some semblance of a pile, but since it needs moist shade to, er, decompose, Roderic built a structure around it. He showed our class how he digs a hole in his pile of compost, fills it with manure, and partially covers it. He often buys live bait, namely earthworms, to break down the manure into soil. According to Roderic, one earthworm works 24/7 for 16 years at the decomposition process. With the amount of worms he keeps in his compost pile, manure generally becomes compost after a month. With the more acidic manure of his goats and his sheep, he covers the manure with a bit of soil, straw, and a tarp, and "cooks" it at a temperature of 60 degrees (he didn't specify Celsius or Farenheit) to kill the "bad" bacteria like ecoli. The temperature is still low enough that he doesn't kill the good bacteria that will break it down into compost. He spreads his compost on everything--it has enough nitrogen in it to be like Miracle-Gro. His outdoor plants he sows according to a lunar calendar; he started just before the full moon, so now his plants get sunlight all day and all night, which makes them bigger and more fruitful. Roderic tries to use the seeds from the plants he eats, but some of the cabbages he grows in his green-house are specifically cultivated to be sterile and not have seeds. Those are the only seeds he buys. He also let us eat leaves straight from his plants. Since he doesn't use chemicals, careful washing is not necessary. I tried a piece of leaf from a purple broccoli, some lettuce, and rugula. Rugula was the weirdest taste: it tasted like a spinach leaf the second it was in my mouth, but all of a sudden became sour and spicy. I didn't care for it much. However, the lettuce was good. Lettuce doesn't have a flavor to me, just the texture of paper. But his lettuce tasted like a plant, and the leaf had lots of water. It gave a whole new meaning to Peter Rabbit's temptation of Mr. McGregor's garden.
He also grows cabbage, leeks, green onions and rice. I was very surprised at the diversity of his plants, but he told our class that when God made the Earth and the people, he put Adam and Eve in the middle of a garden, not a coffee field. Therefore, it is important to mix the plants because they each take and give something to the soil that other plants might need. His goats have a dual purpose: they are his lawnmowers. He said they eat everything in sight, and unlike cows, don't destroy the crops.
Roderic's production is low compared to his chemical-relying competitors. He feels that organic is better because it teaches him a valuable lesson: patience. Also, with two children and a wife, Roderic wants to be around as a father for his family. His wife works in the city, but the family could very easily survive on just the farm. He is one of two workers on his farm, the other a young Cuban.

After the tour, we were served with fruit from the farm and their very own brand of coffee. It was good. I don't even like coffee, but if all coffee tasted like that, I would drink it. I will definitely bring some back.

Bombs, and other expressions

2009-02-08T18:19:00.004-05:00

I had a conversation today with my host family about the difference between a bomba de gasolina or a "gas station" and just a bomba, or a "bomb". My question was more or less why they were called something similar. I told them I wouldn't ever want to go to a place that advertised gasoline and an explosive device in the same name.

Here, the term bomba is pretty much used for everything. As far as the gas station is concerned, the term refers to the crank of "Lizzie" cars way back when, if I understood correctly. The Ticos also say bomba in songs of limmerick--I'll try to explain better: there are some very old and very traditional rhyming verses of two lines each, and in parties someone will start, and they'll recite one of the rhymes. At the end of the two lines, everyone yells, bomba! and if someone else knows another two lines, they'll sing next. It's like a call and response of the "southern" churches, except that each two lines will each tell a different story and I think the singer can modify his lines if he is quick enough to do so.

Other expressions of note:
¡Pura vida!--means "Pure life!", or "It's the best!"
¡Tuanis!--same thing.
¡Solo bueno!--means, "Only good!" Used in conversation: "How is your job?" "¡Solo bueno!"
¡Soque!--means, "Hurry up!"
¡Qué chiva!--means, "How cool is that?" or rough equivalent
¡Charita!--teasing lament, mostly used in the country. Same equivalent as "You poor baby" or "Aw, what a bummer".

Have a nice day!

Liked and Crazy

2009-02-07T20:19:00.003-05:00

I wonder about the crazy people on the streets, the ones who talk to themselves. Are they really crazy, or is their reality so different from the reality they live in that they don't know which to believe?

One of the girls in the group has taken on the "nerd" role. She's a really nice girl and I don't know what she's like outside of this program, but she talks all the time. It's hard to have a conversation because of the subjects she chooses to talk about--they're often very abstract, and have little meaning. Is this terrible of me to write about this on my blog? I don't mean any disrespect or even to talk about her behind her back--I was only trying to make sense of something:

What happens when one person's reality is ignored or disregarded by others in that reality? If reality is more or less a collective hunch of other people's opinions, then is it fair to say that a reality of disregard and indifference directly affects the person's sanity? Consider: studies show that a child who grows up in a home with little to no encouragement and plenty of demeaning insults will have some sort of self-esteem issue. That child's only reality is rejection and insults. The child will also not assume anything is wrong with his homelife until he compares it with other children from loving families. What then? I see two paths: either the child will seek to please others (teachers, other parents, etc) just to get compliments, which will eventually help his self-esteem, or he himself will reject the "evidence" of his abuse and convince himself it is merely coincedence that other families are like each other and not like his.

If, hypothetically, a person chooses the second choice (even though I think the first is most likely) he will believe the lies for himself, that he really is stupid, or a waste of time, or worthless scum. This becomes reality.

Also, I have in mind a similar case that happened to me when we were missionaries in Mexico: I tried so hard to get the other children to like me, but it was difficult to speak the language, and everyone laughed at my accent. I reverted to talking to my stuffed animals. They didn't laugh at me. They loved me. They always wanted to hear about my day, and they always understood how I was feeling when the other children made fun of me. During that time, I also started talking to myself a lot. I think this is because I desperately wanted someone to ask my opinion, or to ask what I was thinking about. I believed that if I talked quietly out loud, someone would take an interest and ask me what I was saying. I never talked about anything important--I just talked. Most of my subjects were very abstract and hard to follow. Once someone did respond to what I was talking about, I just wanted to have that person listen and agree with everything I said. Perhaps this was a reaction to the negative response I was getting.

I feel like this is more or less the same situation with the girl from the group. It's weird to see it from the other side.

So, crazy people: are they still just crazy?

Bad Weather

2009-02-07T19:55:00.003-05:00

Hi again. Sorry for the long lapse of nothingness...Costa Rica has been getting rain all day and violent, hurricane-like winds for the last four days, so our internet connection has been down. This is the first I've been able to get online for a couple days. Also, this week was our hardest week of classes: I had two 3-5 page papers due written entirely in Spanish about subjects I am generally clueless in English, I had a 5 minute oral presentation in Spanish about a free subject that I wasn't able to research due to lack of internet connection, and I had to read 4, 50-page chapters for two different speakers in my Culture class. Needless to say, I'm bushed. I went to bed early last night--it was glorious.

RAIN:
Seriously, I am going to try and record the rain on my digital camera. It doesn't fall like the rain in Indiana, it floats. It's like there is rain in the air, and you can breathe it in, and it hits your face...it's like the fine mist of one of those water sprizters--not enough to get soaked, but just enough to need to change...

LOVE:
Every single couple I have seen in this country has no concept of discretionary affection. PDA city. Seriously. I mean, it's kind of sweet at first to see couples whispering in each others' ears, or holding hands, but after the first two couples, it gets old fast. And only because I can't look away or I'll see another couple making out or something.

MANNEQUINS:
For those of you who didn't already know, I have this weird dislike of mannequins. It's a long story. However, I have seen more mannequins in storefronts here than I have ever seen in the States. Also, it seems that many of the female mannequins are between changes of clothing. At first, I thought it was just a mistake, to have the mannequins nude on the storefront, but given the previous paragraph about love, it gives me pause. Since I have not seen any male mannequins "between outfits", I'm a little suspicious...

ICE CREAM:
Okay. I admit it. My name is Elise Arvidson, and I have a problem. I'm addicted to ice cream. It's just so delicious!! The ticos put fruit in their ice cream--real fruit, not canned--and they douse it in sweetened condensed milk. It's so good.

Okay. I have a deeper topic that I'm going to write next.

Forgot to mention...

2009-02-01T18:04:00.002-05:00

By the way,

HAPPY FEBRUARY!!!

Limón, Costa Rica

2009-02-01T17:21:00.004-05:00

Okay, so I had it wrong the first time, Limón is NOT in Peru, it is a province of Costa Rica. And no, I wasn't thinking of Peru's capital Lima, I honestly thought that there was also a Limón in Peru. Whatever. So here is a link of a map of Limón, where we were. I apologize that it is in Spanish, but the map itself is fairly self-explanatory... According to the last link, our group visited the purple area labeled No. 1: Limón, Limón.

We got to go through the rainforest to get to Limón, Limón. It was fascinating to watch as the vegetation around the road became more tropical. The provice of Limón is right on the Caribbean sea, so it was very warm. I liked it. There is a small island just off the coast of Puerto Limón (in the cantón of Limón, Limón) where Colombus landed on his third voyage to the Americas. There is also a native reservation the Bribri tribe in that area. For more information, click this link. There are also many tourist-y things about Limón that end up being a problem with the general population; for instance, Limón has the reputation throughout all of Costa Rica of being the "poor" district. The majority of the population in Limón are of African decent, and speak Spanish. The blacks are in the majority because they were the workers of choice for the construction of the railroad, as the Chinese immigrants and the Italians kept getting sick with the New World diseases. The blacks were actually imported from the island of Hispañola (Dominican Republic/Haiti) where they worked in the sugar cane fields to work in Costa Rica because they had been acclamated to the climate and to the diseases. Think of black ghettoes in the U.S. This is how Costa Ricans view Limón.

Our assignment as students was to go and talk to the people on the streets and ask them questions about racism, education, and government. Everyone that my group interviewed said that there was no racism in Limón, because there was such diversity. Even if gringos weren't that common, we were (according to the locals) less likely to be mugged/robbed/etc. in Limón than in any other part of Costa Rica. There are still many Italian-Costa Ricans in the area, and even Chinese-Costa Ricans. But still, the majority are the African-Costa Ricans. We also asked about pobreza, which means poverty and how the locals defined it and what they thought would be a good solution. One gentleman we asked said that education was the answer to poverty, and most of the others said that more opportunities were the answer. We even met a hippie selling jewelry on the street who said that the Costa Rican government was to blame for the poverty in Limón because they put more money into making the tourist sites on the coast more attractive than they spend on cleaning up the cities. There were no public trash cans in the small town where we stayed. Instead, there were heaps of trash on the street corners or by vegetable stands. To walk on the sidewalk usually meant finding the cleanest path through the rubbish.

It was a fascinating trip, and yes, I am darker still. My host family told me today that I look Dominican. I'll take that as a compliment, thank you : )

Also, on Saturday night, the professors hired a band to come and play for us while we ate traditional food of the Caribbean, and we all learned to salsa! I guess I already knew how to salsa, but I thought there was more to the dance. I learned, however, that all Caribbean dances are the same steps, just variations depending on the music. The boys all stood around awkwardly, while the girls learned the steps and danced with each other. Soon, the girls started pulling the boys to the dance floor and teaching them the steps. It was like junior high dances, but with college students. Very funny.

More later on banana plantations, mono-cultures, pineapples, and eco-friendliness...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, PHIL!!

2009-01-30T01:18:00.002-05:00

Just thought I'd write this now. My culture class is taking a trip to Limón, Costa Rica and we'll be gone until Sunday.

I miss you, Phil!

Have a wonderful day!

SKYPE

2009-01-28T22:53:00.003-05:00

Dear Friends and Family,

I just added a Skype gadget to my blog. I don't know if it will work, but if it does, you should be able to chat with me (send me instant messages), and or send me files. I'm not sure if you need to already have a Skype account or not.

Okay, thanks!

Comments

2009-01-28T22:28:00.003-05:00

Dear Friends and Family,

Please, please, please feel free to write comments to my posts. I have adjusted my setting so that you may do so. Also, I don't know how many of you read this as often as I write it; therefore, I don't plan on sending out an email to everyone when I write something new. However, if and when you have questions, please do not hesitate to email me at my SAU address. I still check that.

Even if you don't have questions, write me an email and tell me about your day! I might not get to it for a while, but I would love the correspondence if you are able.

I miss you all!
Lots of love,

Elise A
Student of Language and Culture
San José, Costa Rica

More -itos

2009-01-26T11:00:00.006-05:00

I didn-t quite explain, but -ito is the suffix/random syllable used on most words to make them either a) endearments, or b) smaller. For instance, "gato" is a cat, and "gatito" is a kitten. Or, my host brother Edgar is named after his father Edgar, so we have don Edgar, and Edguitar.

SWEETENED CONDENSED MILK:
So, sweetened condensed milk is used more or less like a sauce here. The Ticos put it on ice cream, in deserts, as a spread on sweet breads, with vegetables...everything.

DOGS:
I have only seen two cats in the last week I-ve been here. Two. Also, it-s considered cruel and unusual punishment to neuter or spade dogs. That-s why there are so many different kinds here.

THE ENVIRONMENT:
Everybody that I've met here in Costa Rica is very environmentally conscious. If I didn't know better, I'd call the entire country a bunch of tree-huggers. But it goes beyond that. Even though there is trash in the street, the majority of Ticos pick up after themselves and recycle plastic bottles, or newspapers, or take the bus instead of a car, or they walk to excercise, or jog, or they can tell you on the spot how many gallons of water are wasted if the tap is left open during a 10 minute shower (it's 30, by the way, for those of you who are curious).

WEATHER:
I was mistaken in my previous post. It is not winter here, it is their summer. Great. That means it gets colder from here on out.

FOOD:
Just a small list of some interesting things I got to eat on my weekend at the beach: green mangoes, ceviche, hot dogs Tico-style, and starfruit. The green mangoes are very, very bitter. "Acidic" was the word used when I asked. You're supposed to dip it in granules of salt and eat it. Also, ceviche is made of diced tomatoes and cilantro, a rough equivalent to the pico de gallo that Hacienda serves with its entreés. Tico-style hot dogs were the hardest for me to eat. I have this thing about hot dogs...I don't like them. Unless they've been roasted over an open fire. Then they are manageable. The Ticos use REAL frankfurters, where they have to split open the casing, and then they boil the frankfurter in water. It is served on a bun with shredded raw cabbage (raw as opposed to cooked), with ketchup, mustard and mayonaise on top. My host mom insisted on adding crushed potato chips to mine, saying it tasted better. And starfruit is not sweet. It's like eating lemon peel. I liked it though, but mine was too bitter, and I chucked it when no one was looking.

THE UGLY AMERICAN:
It's weird, but now I can see how I might have looked to the Ticos on my first day. I hope I wasn't as insensitive as I've seen, but at the same time, it's weird. I've seen tourists in Central San José try to buy ice cream. Many of the names of companies from the United States are still in English, and I've watched the tourists speak slowly and deliberately the one thing they want. When the girl at the cashier repeats the order to them, they try to correct her, as she isn't saying the English words correctly. If she asks them something else, I have not seen any attempt to use Spanish to communicate. In fact, I have more often seen that the tourists become frustrated that the Costa Rican girl cannot speak English, and they are verbal about it to each other. Grant me one more say, friends and family, but shouldn't the tourists try to speak Spanish in a Spanish-speaking country instead of insisting that everyone should know English?

AMERICANS:
I was asked this question recently, and have found that many Ticos are slightly annoyed as well: why do we from the United States insist on calling ourselves "Americans"? We call someone from Argentina an Argentine, as much as a person from Costa Rica is a Costa Rican. However, all of these countries are a part of "the Americas". Technically, any Canadian should be able to call himself an "American" too.

NAMES:
I mentioned in an earlier post that the Ticos are fond of naming their pets names that the Ticos can hardly pronounce. My extended family had three dogs: Lucas (nicknamed "Killer), who growls when petted or touched; Sweet, who bites people she doesn't know, and Terry, who is more sheep than dog and pants as though she were hyperventilating. The two dogs in the house I live in are Beky and Sandy. Beky looks older and has a little bow in her hair. Sandy is extremely energetic and all black.

SHOWERS:
Here, everyone but everyone takes showers in the morning. There are few exceptions.

APPLES:
Apples are expensive here, like avocados can be expensive in Indiana.

MILK:
It comes in cartons, like they had in Mexico. They are homogenized and pasteurized, but can be stored unopened in cupboards until needed. They taste the same. Also, many milk products come in squeeze-able packet-containers. They're hard to describe, but each has a spout from which to pour or squeeze the product. One milk-based product that I like is called natilla, and is more or less a light sour cream. It is squeezed into a cup and used as a dip for bread and/or vegetables.

V vs. B:
Here in Costa Rica, it seems that every word with a 'b' in it is pronounced with a 'v' sound, and every 'v' is pronounced as a hard 'b'.

Okay. That's good enough for now.

Weekend Fun

2009-01-26T10:01:00.003-05:00

We went to the beach this last weekend, with a tiny dog nicknamed "Killer", a dog named "Sweet" who bit people, and lots of relatives. What I don't understand is why the Ticos insist on naming their pets names that they can hardly pronounce...

As soon as I got back from school, I hurriedly took everything out of my backpack and replaced my books with pjs, my swimsuit and toiletries. Then my host family and I tried to fit ourselves in the Toyota station wagon. We didn't all fit. There were six of us, my host parents, their sons Edgar and Esteban, and their grandson José Daniel. José is 15, and a very bright kid. I didn't quite understand everything that happened; doña Isabel kept saying something about the nephew of her only brother, but she never seemed to finish her sentence before she was interrupted by something else. Needless to say, we pulled up in front of a house some 20 minutes later, and I got out of the car, and began trying to help bring things in. It didn-t look like the beach to me, but what do I know? Isabel saw what I was doing, and handed me back the pillow I was trying to give her, and told me to wait in the car. I did as I was told. At one point, everyone disappeared inside the house while I was waiting. Eventually my host parents came back, and got in the front seats of the car. We were dropping off the other three to ride with cousin Carlos.

I cannot accurately describe the next two hours it took to make it to the coast. With no one to talk to after the conversation ran out, I realized how tired I was. Isabel encouraged me to lie down in the back seat on everybody-s pillows and take a nap. I did.

The house was owned by Isabel-s only brother, Carlos, who works with an electricity company that bought lots of land on the coast. It was small, but spacious. It had three doors, and when we arrived, all were thrown open to receive the breeze. Did I mention it-s warmer by the coast? It-s warmer by the coast. So warm, in fact, that I wore my swim suit under shorts and a t-shirt for both Saturday and Sunday. It was paradise! "Uncle" Carlos took us to see the sunset on the beach on Saturday. At first I thought it was the light, but when I got closer I realized the beach had black sand. I-ve never seen black sand before. I wanted to take a handful, but decided that was a dumb idea. What would I do with black sand?

I got darker too. According to my Tico family, I now look Costa Rican. The expression they use here for going to the beach to tan is that I went to "agarrar mi color", or "take my color". I was privy to several "traditional" Costa Rican foods, music etc. For instance, I didn-t know this, but there are such things as green mangos. The Ticos eat green mangos with salt. It has a very bitter taste, but when I said the mango was "agria" or "sour" they corrected me and said it was "acido" or "acidic". They are two different flavors, apparently. I was also able to eat starfruit right from the tree. My family assured me that starfruit was "dulce" (sweet), but I didn-t think so. When no one was watching, I pitched it in the garden.

Here in Costa Rica, 18 is the legal age to both smoke and drink. I think that don Edgar and doña Isabel were the only two who weren-t drinking all the time. My extended family was surprised that I didn-t "tomar" (drink alcohol) even though I was 2 years "past age". I tried to explain that in the United States the legal age is 21, but they insisted that while I was here, I was legal and I should enjoy myself. I even got the famous "you don-t know what you-re missing" line. I said I-d find out when I came of age. Maybe. Maybe not.
Only one of the aunts could really be considered a "drunk", though. Everyone else drank to be sociable, it seems.

It was still fun, and I-m hoping that next time, I have the space of mind to remember my camera. My host parents practically promised that they-d take me with them again because the family is fun to be around.

*DISCLAIMER*
I am at an internet café right now, and the keyboard is in English and Korean by the looks of it. So, once again, I apologize for the puncutation errors.

-itos

2009-01-22T22:32:00.003-05:00

The following posts will be very short, more of a collection of random things that I don't feel like writing a page about:

GABRIEL'S OBOE:
It's an orchestral/choral piece of music with oboe as the solo instrument. Here in Costa Rica, I hear it on the television along with the announcement of someone's death.

LANDMARKS:
They're everywhere. On top of that, so few of the streets have actual names that direction to any location includes more things to look for than street signs. For instance: I know I am about 5 minutes from the house when the bus turns the corner and there's a big Shell station. I have no clue what street that is. When I get off the bus on that road, I continue until I see the purple wall, then turn right, and pass two panaderías or bread bakeries, before coming to my street.

CULTURE SHOCK:
Oddly enough, I think I've already endured it. According to Don Antonio (one of my "culture" profs), culture shock has 5 stages that can be encountered during or even before entering the new culture. They are: the Honeymoon stage, where the new is exciting; the valley "Culture Shock", where new is apprehensive; the Surface Adjustment stage, where the person begins to figure things out; the Unresolved Question stage, where personal cultural values are questioned; and the Feel at Home stage, where one accepts the new culture. Of course, these are followed eventually by the Departure Concerns stage before the person leaves. To anyone who has read my blog through, I had already been through the first four even before I stepped on the plane. I think the Feel at Home stage kicked in once we landed in San José.

GESTURES:
We had a discussion about this after class one day. The Ticos have an arm gesture for telling people to come near which can be confusing for many North Americans. They use their arm to push and pull. Think of doggy-paddling in a pool. That motion. When done by North Americans, it looks as though the speaker (gesture-er?) is telling others to go away, but the Ticos understand it as a come here motion.

WAL*MART:
Seriously, Wal*Mart rules the earth. Here, they are called the local MásXMenos, and they are owned by the Wal*Mart corporation. In fact, they are formally know as Wal*Mart Sudamérica, or South American Wal*Mart. And anyone who knows some Spanish will see the pun of the store's name, but for those of you who don't... The name is pronounced mahs pohr meh-noes, and literally means "More for Less", another slogan of Wal*Mart's.

TOILET PAPER:
In many homes, toilet paper goes in the trash, not in the toilet because it clogs.

Well, that's as random as I'll get tonight. I didn't sleep last night at all because I was reviewing those dumb direct objects, indirect objects, and pronouns in my head ALL NIGHT LONG!!! I kept trying to sleep, but my brain would find another way to keep me up. I'm so tired!

Oh wait, I almost forgot. The Quote of the Day goes out to fellow LASP-er Regis Coburn:
"Whenever I plug my laptop in, sparks come out of the socket. Is that bad?"

Good times.

Good night everyone!

Male Presence

2009-01-21T23:01:00.004-05:00

It appears as though I am living in a different era. The men here are not so chauvanistic as, perhaps, they were in earlier years. Nevertheless...

A man is strong. He is viewed as the head of his household, and families want sons to carry on their name. When the instructors sent us all over the city, they sent us in groups of three with at least one male. This is because it is assumed in Costa Rican culture that if one man tries to harm another man's "woman", the second will defend the woman's honor. It's not so much chauvanistic as it is chivalrous. Also, in groups of two, people assume couples, so herein lies the saying, "Three's company". In groups of three, it wasn't as though the women were traveling by themselves, and it wasn't as though a group was a couple. Also, the male (as I said before) provided a "security" for the females, to keep us free from persistent vendors, or dirty old men.

My mom always taught me that young women are always accompanied/chaperoned. At the time, I thought it was an antique idea, wrought by shriveled old people who just wanted to give advice to other people free of charge (sorry Mom). I understand better now. It is a statement of belonging, yes, but of unity. It is a security. And here, as a young woman, I need it. This is why I'm glad that Peter is my "travel buddy". It's because he's a male. At least when it's nighttime and we're returning from classes, I know my chances of getting mugged or worse are very slim.

I'll probably update this later as I find more things to write about.

Classes

2009-01-21T22:24:00.003-05:00

Okay, so I know I said I would talk about male presence here, but it was brought to my attention that I have neglected to describe what I've been doing here for the last week. Gee. Well, so, classes:

I have only two classes. They are both about 4 hours long. We get breaks in between.

My main class is my Spanish class that I have every day of the week (except for weekends). On Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays, the class begins at 1 p.m. and may last until 4:30 or 5 p.m. On Tuesdays and Thursdays, I have my other class in the morning, so I need transit time between them. On those days, my Spanish class starts at 1:30 p.m.

My "other" class is called Semenario Basico or abbreviated S.B. It is more or less a culture class with a Christian emphasis. It meets twice a week on Tuesdays and Thursdays at 8 a.m. and usually ends around midday.

A typical Monday/Wednesday/Friday, I will wake up at whatever time I want, provided that my homework is finished, and I still plan on eating before I leave. I will take a bus to Central San José, and then jog a few blocks to take another bus to Curridabat. Total transit time from home to class: 45-50 minutes.
Tuesdays/Thursdays, I wake up at about 5:30 a.m. so I can take my shower and get ready. I eat breakfast before I leave to catch a bus at 7:15 a.m. to El Carmen. Transit time from home to class: 30-40 minutes. From S.B., I can either take a taxi to Curridabat or I can walk. Last time I walked, and it took me about 50 minutes. The problem with walking is that I may not get to eat lunch if class gets out right at noon. Many students take a taxi to Curridabat. After class I take the bus from Curridabat to Central San José, jog a few blocks, and take another bus from Central San José to Guadalupe El Alto, where I live. Total transit time from class to home: 50 minutes (depending on traffic).

In my Spanish class today, we reviewed the direct object and indirect object and pronouns. I always had a hunch that I hadn't completely grasped the concept in previous Spanish classes, but to have it proved to me beyond a doubt by my pitiful attempts to do my homework, well, I certainly won't be able to sleep tonight... I have some extra work to do.

Yesterday, in my S.B. class, the speaker lectured on the ways that Jesus interacted with people of a different nationality. She (the speaker) outlined the times in which Jesus lived, and his ultimate response to the problems of his day. It was very fascinating, and I took many notes.

Okay, this is long enough.

"Piropos"

2009-01-20T21:26:00.004-05:00

The word, in the Tico vernacular, means some equivalent of cat-calls or wolf-whistling. It's pronounced "pee-roh-pohs".

When we first arrived to Costa Rica and sat through our first lecture of the semester, the profesoras warned the girls (and guys too, because sometimes, it happens) about piropos. The profesoras said that girls who were visibly lighter-skinned and fair-haired were more likely to be cat-called. The slang term for someone lighter is macha for a girl, and macho for a male. The teachers told us that a lot of students think that (for men) being called macho is a compliment, but here, roughly translated, it means, "Hey, White-y." It is also a rough equivalent to the many blonde jokes in the United States, where someone would say, "Jane, you're so blond," here they would say, "María, eres tan macha." The day that we went all over the city, we were supposed to check off if we received any piropos. My group didn't, and I think it was because the other girl and I had dark hair and eyes, and looked less American than did our group-mate Dustin, who's 5'8", blond-haired and blue-eyed. He definitely stood out. But, as he was with us, it probably looked as though the other girl and I were showing him his way around the city.

Also, we were advised--I take that back--forbidden from reacting in any way to the piropos. If we react, the men (usually it's men) would take that as a challenge and pursue us. Physically, I mean. We were warned that it would turn ugly, which is why they tried to put us into groups with one male each. A male in the group ensures some sort of protection, even if he is outnumbered by the females. I will remember to write on the male presence tomorrow.

Good night everyone!

Manners

2009-01-20T21:07:00.004-05:00

Here, it is considered good manners to wait for invitations. That applies to most everything of daily life.

When first I arrived, it would have been very disrespectful of me if I had helped myself to whatever I wanted to eat or drink right after the family had shown me where it was. This is because, here, I am a guest. A guest does not serve himself until he is part of the family. A guest is served. As I become more accostomed to my host family, and they to me, I begin to aquire "family rights" as it were. I offer to help with dinner, or with washing the dishes now. Usually the señora accepts my help. Sometimes, she insists she's fine, and tells me to sit down and watch the television while she does the dishes, or whatever. My general rule-of-thumb is that if it's a meal for more than 3 people, I always offer to help with anything and everything. Otherwise, the doña thanks me, but does the work herself.

Another thing I've noticed that I've found interesting is this: gratitude.

In Spanish, when someone wants to say "thank you", they say "gracias" or "muchas gracias" (much thanks). Generally, the rough translation of "you're welcome" is "de nada" or "it was nothing". Here in Costa Rica, the more common form I hear for "you're welcome" is the phrase, "con gusto", or "with gusto/pleasure". It means something similar, but not the same. To me, "de nada" more or less takes the gratitude and shrugs it off: it was nothing. By contrast, the phrase "con gusto" more or less expresses the speaker's attitude toward serving. The Ticos are very much a serving people.

Something to think about, I guess!

Water

2009-01-20T20:49:00.004-05:00

Don't believe a word of it!!! The water is NOT warm. At all.

Drinkable, yes (all over the city of San José, I might add), but warm enough in which to take a comfortable shower? Nope. The good news is, that whereas I once enjoyed a long 30 min shower a day, I now enjoy only 10 minutes. Like fast-food, the shower has become an "in-and-out". Of course, I specifically try to go quickly (besides the fact of cold water) because this is not my home, and I don't want to ruin people's shower schedules.

But here, it's the in-and-out business.

The shower fixture in the home I'm living is such that, if one turns the knob barely to the left, the water will come out of the shower, and I may get as much as 3 seconds' worth tepid water before it turns ice cold again. This discovery was through trial and error; I tried once turning the knob all the way to the left, but to no avail. The water didn't get hotter or colder (it couldn't get colder), but stayed the same. I really appreciate the showers at home.

To add "insult to injury" as the expression goes, the Ticos insist that cold water showers are healthier because they don't dry out your skin, and they open your pores, and they let your color shine. Yeah. They would say that... Of course, by ensuring that I spend no more than 10 minutes in the shower, I can sleep in longer. That's good.

And yes, as I said earlier, the water is drinkable. The doña makes me tea every morning. I try to get it myself, but most of the time, she won't let me. I'll explain manners in another post.

Just to clarify, I still clean myself thoroughly, just in one third the amount of time it took me before.

First Day of Classes!!

2009-01-19T23:16:00.004-05:00

So, given my extraordinary sense of direction *sarcasm*, I felt it necessary to find a travel buddy. The closest student to me is named Peter. He attends Greenville College in Illinois.

Peter very kindly consented to catch a bus with me, so we agreed to meet at the bus stop at a certain time. When I got there, he wasn't. He showed up a few minutes later having checked another bus stop because he wasn't sure which I meant. So we took a bus to Central San José, and we were going to take another to Curridabat, where our class was meeting, but we were running late, so we took a taxi. Bus fare is at most, c250, and our taxi cost us c1188. We arrived tardy, but class hadn't started yet.

We were separated into Spanish level groups. I was in the last group of "almost native" speakers. I like the two girls in my group! One of them is the same girl who tackled me in MIA when I was lost, and the other is a girl from Canada. They are both very funny, and our entire class was spent talking about ourselves and things that are important to us so that our professor could decide what Spanish lessons would be most beneficial.

After class (it ended at about 4:30 p.m.) I had to go to the post office to mail something to the U.S. Peter came with me, and we got lost in the city trying to find the post office. Thankfully though, the Central is small enough that a few blocks in this direction or that, and you regain your bearings. We found the post office and I tried to send my envelope as fast as they would take it. It's very important. Watch it get lost.
After that, Peter and I wanted to take a bus from Central San José back to Guadalupe, El Alto, where we both live. We thought that any bus that said "Guadalupe" would suffice. Nope. We ended up going through "El Barrio Pilar" somewhere north of where we wanted to be. At one point, the seat next to me opened up, and Peter came to sit by me. The first thing he said was, "So...I don't know where we are..."
"Neither do I," I answered. "What do we do now?"

We asked another bus mate, and she told us we were north of El Alto. She even got off the bus and walked with us toward the street near where I live (by the way, the street I live on--it doesn't have a name. But the main street near it does). After a while, Peter recognized the surroundings, so we thanked the lady and continued until I recognized the surroundings. I made it home, and my host mother was so happy that I made it safely, she made me some tea. Then she laughed with me about our pitiful attempt to ride just any bus that said Guadalupe.

Note to self: Details are very important...

I still have some reading to do before my class tomorrow at 8 a.m. so I think I'm going to bed now to read.

Good night!!

Clean

2009-01-18T22:50:00.004-05:00

I remember when we moved to Mexico, I thought everything was dirty. Now, I have a different perspective.

My Tico family believes that the floor is the most common cause of colds. My host brother Esteban has a bit of a cold now, and I overheard doña Isabel scolding him for leaving his clothes on the floor. The floors in this house are mostly a sweep-able material, be they wood or tile. The tiny patch of carpet is swept with the floor. But, as the floor is the most germ-infested area of the house (according to Ticos), we always wear shoes. Always. I'm so glad I thought to bring my fluffy slippers.

The thing is, that even though there are cracks in the walls, stains on the upholstry (sp?), and the white towels aren't still completely white, this family would never give me something they themselves would refuse. The cracks in the walls are necessary in the summer to let the heat escape and the breeze come in. The stains--well, they couldn't use straight bleach to a blue couch! Besides, you can hardly see it if you aren't looking for anything. The off-white towels are the good towels; they're the ones that everyone in the family hopes to get because they dry well, and are well used. The Ticos have everything they need for survival, and yet they don't feel the need to sanitize everything in sight. Of course, they use what they have to keep their spaces habitable. With the thousands of germ-killing products in the U.S., we manage to keep our spaces surgical.

Besides, I have a theory about sanitization: the less germs we're exposed to, the more often we get sick. Think I'm wrong? Consider vaccinations. Why would any sane human being inject himself with a weakened virus? Seriously?? And yet, science tells us that by coming in contact with this weakened virus, our own antibodies will learn to conquer the new sickness and keep us well.

Thus, what is clean to my Tico family, I will also consider clean.

Money

2009-01-18T22:32:00.005-05:00

The exchange rate here is about 550 colones to one U.S. dollar. The thing is, the amounts mean different things.

Here, 550 colones is about how much it would cost to take a cheap bus from Guadalupe, El Alto (where the house is) to Central San José. I bought shampoo and conditioner yesterday for c1522 each (approximately), totalling about c3088 (I can't remember the exact number; this is a rounded estimate). In the U.S., anything worth $1000 or more is really expensive to me, but down here, that's just how it goes. Yesterday, I saw an advertisement for Taco Bell (yes, ironically, they have Taco Bell down here) that was for their newest burrito, only c500! That's supposed to be cheap.

I'll try to list the denominations of money for the curious:
In coins, c5 is the lowest, c10, c20, c25, c50, c100, c200, c500.
With bills, c1000 is the lowest, c2000, c5000, c10000, and on up.

$20 equals about c11000. I carry about that much with me most of the time because it's enough for 4 separate bus trips and anything urgent. If I get pickpocketed, it isn't very much either.

Tomorrow I have my first class! Spanish class!!

UPDATE (19 Jan 09):
Actually, it seems that a c500 piece will take me on a bus to and from Central San José; When I went to classes today, I paid the first bus with a c500 piece, got change and was going to use that for the next bus to Curridabat, but we took a taxi instead.

Endearments

2009-01-18T22:19:00.005-05:00

I have gone the last half-week with many variations on my name.

It isn't hard for the Ticos to pronounce my name, it's just that, in Costa Rica, nicknames are given to people you like, and my family likes me, so I've been going around with half a name...

Here, I'll explain:
My name in English is Elise. When I say it to the Ticos, they follow the rules of Spanish and put the accent of my name on the second-to-last syllable, making it E-lise instead of E-lise. No big deal. However, in Spanish, my name is Elisa, which forces the accent to match, but the family I live with have a daughter who is also named Elisa. Thus, the nicknames. I've been called every variation of 'the girl Elise' to 'Lisa'. The daughter is nicknamed 'Eli', and my name constantly changes. Mostly, I've been addressed without a title, just to avoid the confusion.

Also, down here, the Ticos tease everybody. I mentioned before that they want to give me a nickname--I'll go further and propose that my Tican family wants to give me a name that fits me with them. That's the type of people they are, Ticos. One of my brothers is always teasing me about my boyfriend, another is teasing me about being clumsy... they all just enjoy life, and they see the funny. By teasing me, they help me see the funny, too. Through teasing and being nicknamed, I am endeared.

Weather

2009-01-17T12:51:00.004-05:00

Contrary to popular belief, it's cold down here.

My group arrived during the dry season, or the Costa Rican winter. It's more or less spring now, and the rains have started. I would say that today's weather is about as mild as an Indiana fall, or something to that effect.

My host mother teases me about being a ranita, or a 'little frog' because my hands are always cold. It's okay, I like frogs! The Ticos always wear a few shirts during this season. I've been wearing my coat, but not during the day so as not to stand out terribly. All of the American students I am with (those who have never been out of the country) find the weather extremely pleasant, and cannot understand why I'm always shivering.

Even though it's the 'dry season' now, like I said, the rains have been coming. Yesterday, there was a constant mist that started at about 1 p.m. (Costa Rican time) and ended at about 6 p.m. It's weather like this that makes my hair a frizz ball. I'm going to go to the farmacía to find some good anti-frizz conditioner.

Well, it's midday here now, so we are going to almorzar, or eat lunch.
¡Hasta luego!

UPDATE 20 Jan 09:
I found something interesting today--the mist (it isn't quite rain) is called "pelo de gato" or "cat's fur" rain. Why? Because the rain is soft, fine (small drops), and short, like cat's hair.

Traffic

2009-01-17T12:34:00.004-05:00

Here, most of the buses and cars have about one speed all the time, the rough equivalent of 50 mph. The Ticos rarely use the turn signals to change lanes, but only to make a perpendicular turn. Everybody swerves. Ironically, however, pedestrians are probably safer here on the streets and on the sidewalks than they would be in the United States. I, personally, think it's because of one of the vast, fundamental differences between Costa Rica and the US: personal rights.

In the US, I have a right to walk on the sidewalk and thus assume I am safe from all harm. In the US, I have a right to cross the street when the light tells me to, and if a car hits me for any reason at all when it is my turn, that car is at fault. In the US, if any car hits me (as a pedestrian) at any time regardless, I am free from blame, according to the law.

In Costa Rica, I have no rights, just survival instincts. If the semáforo turns red, but no cars are coming, cross the street (this excludes large streets and refers only to the smaller streets downtown). If the semáforo turns green, but cars are still coming, don't cross. If no cars are coming on a street and you need to get to the other side, cross quickly. When the cars are stopped at an intersection, regardless of where you are on the street, cross the street. The cars generally swerve to avoid hitting people, or they will stop, and instead of yelling at you to get out of the street, will wish you a happy day, and blessings on your family. It was really disconcerting the first day, when I was with my host mom and she was showing me the bus stop. I totally thought we were about to die.

All the cars down here are stick-shift. My host family teased me because I can only drive an automatic, and my eldest host brother promised to teach me how to drive his car. I hope he forgets he mentioned it.

More later!!

New Family: in greater detail

2009-01-16T18:54:00.004-05:00

My host family is so wonderful! My host mom is named Isabel, and she's an artist. The house is full of un-hung paintings and prepared canvases, and art supplies. It looks as though she does everything she can: she works with oils, I've seen a few watercolor, sculptures and even mosaics. Right now, she is making a purse out of burlap sacks for her granddaughter Raquel.
My host father is very quiet, but very welcoming too. I want to get to know him better, but I always feel shy around him.
The couple has two granddaughters staying with them right now. Camila is about 8, and I think Raquel is about 14. They are very nice to me, and talk to me. The couple's eldest sons come to the house every day to spend time with the family. I've been able to speak to both of them fairly well--once again, I am astounded at how well I can speak, understand, and be understood...

Isabel always asks me if I'm hungry, and gives me food to eat all the time. She jokes that she's going to make me fat with all the rice and beans, and the bread.

There are several staples in the Costa Rican diet: one is a form of rice and beans that is called gallopinto (gah-yo peehn-tow). It generally has onions and garlic that are sauteéd in a pan before adding black beans. The Ticos (Costa Ricans) use a special sauce called by its brand name, Lizano for nearly every type of seasoning. I keep sneezing whenever I smell it. It isn't spicy, it just makes me sneeze.
Another staple is eggs or meat. We eat a little meat with every meal, and have delicious bread all the time. For breakfast, I have eaten gallopinto, some tea, and bread. For lunch (lately, anyway. It will probably change when I start classes), I have sandwiches, and a little bit of fruit. The family I am with does not generally eat dinner, as they have a bigger midday meal. I'm trying to wean myself to fit into their lifestyle.

I love the city! There's so much to do!
I'll write more later!

¡Hasta luego, y que tengan buena noche!

The Trip: in more detail

2009-01-16T18:13:00.003-05:00

Hello again!! I told you I would write soon!!

All right, so starting from the beginning of my story: I left from South Bend Regional Airport on 13 Jan really early. It was snowing out, and there were huge drifts and piles of snow all over the place. I made it through the scary security, and sat down to wait. I kept to myself and watched the other passengers. It was probably self-conciousness, but I felt as if the older business people were watching me too. I know I look rather young for my age, but it made me uncomfortable. A huge thanks goes out to my dad at this time for helping me keep my sanity in those last few moments before the trip. Dad, I love you.

I got on the smallest plane I've ever been on in my life, and sat back in my seat to take a picture of the snow outside the window. During the flight to my connection in Atlanta, I was able to get well acquainted with my seat-mate, a businessman to some sort of a conference in Atlanta. We spoke of everything from politics, to schools, to religion and theology. He was very fascinating to talk to because he had many observation and questions. I tried my hardest not to talk all the time, but I'm afraid I probably said the most... When we arrived in Atlanta, GA, I felt it was prudent to first find my gate and then see about using the restroom, etc., but the Atlanta International Airport is the biggest place I've ever seen in my life. Ever. Thankfully, there were so many signs that I had little trouble finding the next gate (though a very long walk), and sat down to read while waiting for my flight. I kept checking the time periodically so I wouldn't miss my flight, but all at once, I looked up and realized that my flight should have left 5 minutes earlier. What's more, I was one of only two people waiting at the gate. I jumped up and asked the lady behind me what flight she was waiting for. Hers was another flight, and I showed her my ticket and asked if I was in the right gate. She told me that maybe my flight had been canceled. I started to panic. The lady suggested I tackle one of the many attendants, but when I looked up to do as she had suggested, there was not a one in sight. Sigh. So, needless to say, I found someone at a desk, handed her my ticket and asked where I was supposed to go. What did she say? ¨Oh, your flight should have left by now,¨ she said, ¨but wait, I can look it up for you.¨ Thankfully, my flight was only delayed, but I had to run to make it to the next gate. The attendant wrote down the number of the gate on my ticket, I thanked her and left really quickly. AIA has ¨ground transport¨ which consists of several trains that run the length of the concourses, making stops at each. It's faster than walking, and so I was advised to take the train. I got on one, but didn't realize it went through each stop, and jumped off before the doors closed. Another attendant saw me and assured me I would make it to Concourse A (I was in Concourse E, naturally). So, I took the next train. The ride made me feel slightly sick watching the walls pass in a blur, so I closed my eyes and held my bag tightly. I made it to the gate with 10 minutes to spare. I was pretty proud of myself.

I finally boarded the jet bound for my destination of Miami, FL, and found that I was the only passenger in my row of three seats. Not that I particularly wanted to sit in the window seat, or in the middle seat, but I made do with the aisle. I read my book, and suffered from motion sickness as a result. When I finally made it to Miami, I wanted to jump for joy, but my stomach wouldn't have allowed that. I had to go and find my luggage, and then I panicked again because I didn't know if my luggage had followed me on the same plane or been delivered ahead of me. Also, the MIA is about as large as the AIA, so I had to first find the luggage area before I would know anyway. Unfortunately, the MIA was having construction done on the lower level (the luggage claim area) and I could not find the name of my plane or my departure city on any of the LCD signs. Once again, I started to panic. I tackled a friendly-looking police officer because I looked appropriately confused and he took me to an electronic board that listed the plane and the luggage area where the passengers could find their belongings. Another gentleman from my plane was also looking for his, so I kept up with him when he went to find the luggage. We found our stuff, and then I went back upstairs to now search for the group of other LASP students, identifiable to me only by the bright orange luggage tags we were asked to wear on our things. We were supposed to meet at the American Airlines counter, but I walked up and down (what I thought) was the length of the counters, pausing to ask many bored-looking attendants in English (I'm not sure why I never thought to use Spanish, it didn't occur to me), until finally, after 20 minutes, I was told by another attendant that I had not walked far enough in one direction. As the original path I had been walking was a good, long distance, I wasn't surprised that there was a longer distance I hadn't yet covered. So I walked that way, and looked at everybody's luggage tags (people probably thought I was looking to steal something unattended), and finally got to the AA counter. I walked around it twice before a girl my age came up to me and said, ¨Hi, are you going to Costa Rica with LASP?¨ Finally!! I was saved!!! I said yes, and sat down with a group of students about my age who said they were 'on the look-out' for younger individuals with confused expressions.

This post is long enough. I will write another detailing my 'new' family!

¡Bienvenidos a Costa Rica!

2009-01-15T11:37:00.004-05:00

I just wrote down a lot of stuff, but the computer deleted it.

My family is so nice! The doña always cooks, and keeps persuading me to eat. I spend much time in the kitchen talking with her because she shows me what she cooks. Yesterday, I helped make some gallopinto, which is rice and black beans mixed together. Doña Isabel sauteés onions, peppers and garlic for the gallopinto. It seems to be a common staple of the country.

Today, our group was split into smaller groups of three people and we were given a map and a list of things to do, and told to meet with them all over the capital at certain times. My group has yet to figure out how to take a bus to the LASP headquarters. We.re about to leave, but since the computer deleted my stuff, I.m trying to make up for it.

I have my own room with my host family, and they have their two granddaughters living with them right now.

They tell me that my accent is definitely not American, but a mixture, it seems between Dominican and Mexican: I drop my .s. at the end of words, but I have a Mexican lilt! Weird.

I know much more Spanish than I thought, and am able to express my ideas fairly well. It.s hard to write this in English because I have been trying to think in Spanish for the last 48 hours!!!

I will write more later!!
¡Que tengan un buen día!

The Last American Post (for a while)

2009-01-12T20:40:00.003-05:00

Dear Readers,

Thank you for reading! I don't know if I have many readers or few, but if you're reading this, I'm thinking of you.

I'm certainly going to take a nap again as soon as I finish, but I wanted to write a little more. To my friends, I will miss you. To my family, I'll miss you more. I feel an odd calm right now, almost as if I'm protected by some invisible shield.

I just wanted to mention that, abroad, my posts will probably be much shorter. I don't know when or if I will find computers that work quickly, and as I write very much in one sitting, I don't want to be forced to rewrite in the event of a timeout... I will take many pictures, though, and hopefully will be able to link them to my posts.

Hmm, I've just written a bunch of nothing. I hate it when I do that. Oh well.

Have a safe week, and enjoy the time you have!

Going solo

2009-01-11T11:17:00.004-05:00

Here I am again, writing to you when I really should be packing...

I want to buy a small copy of the American Constitution so I have my Rights on hand, although why I would need them desperately, I'm not sure...I feel it is best to be prepared. I actually made two separate lists for packing: one lists everything I want to take with me, and the other lists where I'm going to pack it. Maybe I'm micro-managing. Probably. Sigh.

I've had the same recurring image in my dreams for the last three days. It happens differently every time, but the gist is the same: I'm almost ready to go, but I walk into my room at home, and it's all filled with boxes and crates. There's a pile to left that goes in my suitcase, and the pile to the right that goes in my carry-on, but nothing fits. I'm such a light packer, that it frustrates me--I'm only trying to take the essentials, but I seem to need everything in the piles, and I can't narrow it down at all...Then the dream will change into something else before going back to the theme. From my humbly unprofessional deduction of dreams, I would hazard a guess that I'm really stressed about this. Really.

Of course, I technically know me better than others, but if that's true, then as an individual who hides unhappy emotions, it follows that I hide my stress not only from others, but from me. Was that a run-on sentence, or what? So sorry. I took higher English classes than the language I appear to be using...

Well, I guess I'm writing now out of pure nerves: I'm absolutely terrified of crossing the country on my own. I don't think my family (and others) actually understand or appreciate this. It doesn't placate me to say that I'll be fine; it doesn't reassure me to tell me how others have made it through the checkpoints. It is others who have made it, not I. I just have to do it. Perhaps it's better to let me blow things out of proportion. There are two very good reasons to do this:

One, I will be very observant of my surroundings and pay very close attention to details. This will help if, God forbid, I am abducted, etc. It will also help because I will give authorities no reason to put me into custody (not that I think they would anyway, I'm just making sure).

Two, if and when my fears prove superfluous I will be very pleasantly surprised. That's a good thing.

Just a thought: I think I want to revise a post I published earlier this month, the one where I think I'm nervous because I am leaving my net of security behind me. I agree to a point (can a person disagree with himself?): I follow rules very meticulously. However, I don't know the best list of things to do, or things not to do. In short, I have no boundaries for this trip in which I can comfortably operate. That's why my security is staying in my hometown: I don't know how to operate outside of it. It is not in my repertoire to travel great distances by myself, therefore, I have no set rules to keep me safe (excluding, of course, common sense), or to tell me how to act or what to say, or even when to say it. I'm going solo.

I leave Tuesday from the airport at 5:50 a.m.

Have a wonderful day, and keep safe!

Closing in

2009-01-06T19:25:00.004-05:00

It's coming ever closer. I keep feeling nervous, but so excited!! I hope these ridiculous conflicts of emotions will finally calm down once I board the plane. But, with my luck, they probably won't.

Speaking of, I'm faced with yet another interesting conundrum (if you don't know that word, Dear Reader, you might as well look it up now because I will probably use it frequently in the coming days/weeks/etc...): I get motion sickness. I am well aware that the pharmaceutical market has invented all these "cures" for motion sickness, but I also react poorly to the side-effects caused by pills and such. So, pills and tablets are out. But here's the thing: I also have a fear of heights. And, I have occasional claustrophobia--How on Earth will I handle the plane ride?? Consider: I cannot sit next to the window because I will fear the height, I cannot sit on the aisle seat because I won't be able to look out a window to connect my sense of gravity and speed (which, oddly enough, helps me NOT be sick), and I cannot sit between the two seats because I will feel claustrophobic. I would sleep, but I'd be terrified that someone would steal my purse...

Sigh.

It figures.

Guess I'll sleep. Maybe those barf bags can be used to calm someone who hyperventilates. I could always tie my shoes to my wrist like they did in the Great Depression. Hmm... maybe that's overreacting a bit.

I'll probably be fine. Yeah, that's it. I'll be fine.

Wow, now I'm writing to reassure myself.

Have you noticed, Dear Reader, that as I continue posting this week, my posts have gotten steadily more flustered? It kind of makes me laugh: I used to not write at all, and now I can't go more than a couple days without imparting my thoughts on the subject...

I think I'll spend some last minute time with my mom. I know how sorry she is that she hasn't been able to spend lots of time with me, and I'm really going to miss her. I wish everyone could see me off--all my friends from the university, my family, my parents...but the plane leaves at 5:50 a.m. and I'm not /that/ desperate, at least, not now. Besides, everyone has things to do, like school and work.

Don't worry, I'm still happy!

Have a wonderful evening, and keep safe!

The coming hill

2009-01-03T11:47:00.004-05:00

So...once again, I find myself slightly apprehensive... Of course, I know that I will probably be extra cautious at the airport because of my paranoia, and thus spare myself of any and all probable situations in which I could be harmed; I will most likely be especially observant of the schedules for the flights, as I am also terrified of missing my plane...

Sigh.

Dear Reader, could you find it in you to leave everything you have behind you except for your camera? ...And clothes, of course. This would be drastically easier if there were only someone to share it with--someone who was going the same place at the same time on the same plane. Then I would be able to hide my fear if only for this companion. Why is it that I can be brave for someone else, but not for myself?

I've noticed that this apprehension has leaked into other behaviors of mine; for example, I want desperately to be with people, and at the same time, I crave my solitude. The contradiction of it is...frustrating, to say the least. I don't know what I want anymore.

Please, do not misunderstand: I am beside myself with glee at the mere thought of spending time in another country to learn the language--it's what I've always dreamed of! It's just that, now the event is closer, I find it increasingly difficult to proceed with such nonchalance than I had earlier. Before, it was as though I were looking across an ocean to the opposite shore; now, it is as though the ocean has shrunk. I still have to cross the ocean, which is the challenge, but the opposite shore is close enough to scare me. What will I find?

I suppose that the decreased size of my ocean should be comforting: I don't have to go as great a distance. However, I understand why many of my peers told me how brave they think me. It is hard to leave a secure web with little less than a few scraps of net to fall back on. I think it must be harder to leave everything behind and start over again--thankfully, I'm not doing that.

Hmm... maybe this is my biggest issue, that I'm leaving my security behind me. I don't think I'm afraid of the new country itself, or even its people. I fear a lack of security.

Lots to think about, though.

Have a wonderful day, and keep safe!

Trial #4

2008-12-28T23:23:00.001-05:00

What about this?

SCORE!!! Okay, sorry about the run about...I got it. It just took me a while to realize I was in the wrong setting, silly me...

We're good.

Trial #3

2008-12-28T23:20:00.001-05:00

Once again here is the link:

Hmmm, another copy and paste? Drat.

Trial #2

2008-12-28T23:18:00.001-05:00

I don't know what that is, but maybe it will work too...

Photo experiment

2008-12-28T23:14:00.002-05:00

I posted some pictures on my Picasa album, and I'm not exactly sure how to do this, but here's the link: http://picasaweb.google.com/sonshinemakesmehappy/HolidaysBeforeILeave?feat=directlink

Copy and paste, I guess. Hmm...there must be some way... I'll keep trying.

Less than a month

2008-12-15T17:04:00.004-05:00

I can't believe it! In less than a month, I will be on my semester abroad! I'm so excited, I feel like a balloon filled with helium!

I haven't written in a while, and I figured now was as good as anything else. So I have a topic I'd like to put out there:

Courage.

What is courage, and where does it come from? Many of my friends from school and friends from home tell me what courage it must take to embark on such an unusual journey in my college years. I never know what to say in response--Honestly, what can I say? "Oh, yes, I frequently partake in activities or events that further strengthen my courage and bravery!!" Please.
And yet, what is said makes me feel stronger. I wonder whether that's just my ego talking, or if I am being "brave". So then, the question remains: What is courage, and where does it come from?

I am a Wizard of Oz fan. Ever since I was a child, I remember the cowardly Lion singing the "Courage" song before the group entered to see the Wizard. I never understood what he meant about the animals having the courage to make noise, be happy etc. but now I think I see it differently. If humans could be divided down to the simplest, most basic form, then (for the sake of argument) that would be the human essence. Secondly, if an individual recognized this essence as his most basic form, would it influence his ideas, his beliefs, his personality? Or would it be his ideas, beliefs, and personality? How many individuals follow themselves as humans? If in essence we were meant to be something far greater than what we allow ourselves to be, is it cowardice to be less? Perhaps it is this essence that is part of an individual's definition. Perhaps it is courage to be real.

If it is courageous to be free to express oneself as much as it is courageous to move to an entirely different area to learn a language, then this courage must not be a thing one is born with; it must be a conscious decision; the decision to be brave. I think back to September 11th. I'll never know if I would have had the bravery of the resistors of Flight 92. Did each participant say to himself, "I am a brave person, therefore I must act!" I'll never know. All I know is that each of them did act, and in the process saved so many more lives. I, on the other hand, am not a "brave" or "courageous" person at all. However, I know that this trip is essential to my fluency in Spanish, and that I will learn a lot more than just the language. Is that courageous, to pursue knowledge? Or is it that others, when placing themselves in my position, would be inclined to shrink from this challenge? Maybe it is that our challenges present us with the choice to be brave, or otherwise.

Regardless, I feel strengthened to think myself "brave". It rings in my ears and reminds me I'm not so destructible as I may believe. This is comforting. Perhaps this is where I will draw courage. I know God is always with me, and probably telling me I should give myself some credit...

Have a nice day!
I will write soon!

September Topic Addressed: Do I really learn in school?

2008-11-12T01:22:00.003-05:00

Well, the answer is obvious, and at the same time, not.
In my English class, we were given a handout titled "The Lost Tools of Learning" by Dorothy Sayers. Although written in the 1950s (or somewhere just after WWII), Sayers purports that the students of her time were not stupid, but were not taught the way she was. Her methods (as described in the essay) of teaching can be represented thus: like an artist "plays" with a new brush to get the "feel" of the instrument, so must a student be taught basics in order to understand the bigger intricacy of life. Sayers felt that education should not be a sole excuse to cram young minds with the latest technology, but that a careful study of science as it relates to language and culture as it relates to economy, should provide a student with the necessary platform from which to build his own logic and reasoning. Because many "subjects" are taught separately in today's schools, students are not sure how to connect one idea to the next--a direct result of a shaky logical platform of thought.

Do I learn in school?
I have been blessed with a) a natural common sense, b) an ability to use that common sense, and c) parents who would show me the consequences of ignoring that common sense... Apparently, I am one of few. This saddens me! How can parents not care? It is forgive-able if the parent tries to instill common sense in a child, but unforgivable if they feel that such instruction is "military" or "mean". How then should a child learn if he is given no solid boundaries upon which he can stand?? I remember that my parents always used to say "If you feel uncomfortable about doing ____, you can tell your friends that we'd rather you didn't." This gave me not only a boundary, but an authority. I'll explain: a boundary becomes a line that because of personal conviction, religious conviction, etc., I will choose not to cross. That boundary comes with my parents' blessing attached--I do not answer to my peers, but to my parents--and thus I have the authority to refuse at all costs because I know my parents will back me up.

When in high school, I can be honest--No, I didn't learn much. At all. Yes, I learned an advanced form of mathematics, as well as an amazing appreciation for geologists. The problem is that my math isn't the best to start with, and that Earth/Space science class should have followed a basic chemistry class instead of coming before it. Fascinating material--really, just, there are very few things that I can repeat correctly from those classes. I learned what I needed to, took the tests, and passed the classes.
Now is when I'm learning. Here, at college. I am discovering how to use my God-given mind, and to wrap it around concepts of which I've only ever dreamed. Teachers ask me to consider theories of other students, other philosophers, etc. They ask me to question why and how--why do I believe that evolution from single-celled organisms is improbable? How is my generation more self-centered than the last, and can anything be done? What is our effect on our selves and on the countries around us? What are the motivations of people who are rich vs. those who are poor? Why does the "little guy" rarely get recognition? What makes the "hot topics" of today? What is the nature of culture, and can that nature ultimately be learned?

It is common sense that motivates learning, I think. This and a quest for common knowledge. By learning the basics, I am free to discover the eccentricities and the "or's" of each case and apply them to other concepts which may appear to have no correlation. I believe that knowledge is the key and the curse of the world in which I live: by knowledge we increase our understanding of others and their culture to better serve our interests. Rarely is knowledge of others used to accomplish purely admirable means. Even if a company markets products that are environment-friendly, one must wonder what other tests showed a negative effect before the "good" product. Don't get me wrong, I think humans are stewards of the environment, and that we should treat it well, but the "Green"-kick we're on scares me: is it just a passing fad like the exercise nuts of the '80s? To top it off, it was knowledge that drove Adam and Eve from the Garden of Eden--just a thought.
Perhaps knowledge is like a tongue: it can be used for both good and evil.

See Mom and Dad? I am learning something!
Have a wonderful Wednesday. Keep safe.

Semester Abroad

2008-10-11T23:57:00.004-04:00

So for those of you of whom I've been so rude as to withhold this information, I'm going on a semester abroad to Costa Rica!! I'm so excited! I've been asking around, and I've decided to take my iPod touch with me because it's smaller and easier to keep track of than my computer--the main idea being that an entire computer bag will pose a greater temptation than a small iPod in my purse/pocket where it can't be seen as well. Also, I will definitely take my camera to capture my exploits!! I'm so excited!! I can access the internet with my iPod, so I will still upload posts. Just recently, I started a Flickr account where I will try to post photos. Just thought I'd mention it so everyone knows!

Lots of love!

UPDATE (28 Dec 08): I switched to a Picasa account, and have discovered how to put in links.

Good bye, September

2008-09-30T21:25:00.003-04:00

Today is the last day of September. Where has the month gone?? It seems like yesterday I was moving in to my room and hoping my roommate would bring a couch...

So, deep theological question: How have I changed in the past month?
Well, for one thing, I can now sleep through the night without getting too many back pains.
I have connected with last-year's friends on campus.
I have been reading my textbooks more.
I have been avidly attacking my homework when I get the chance.
I have made many new friends, most of them freshmen.
Instead of wondering what on earth I'm going to do this fall, I've gotten a pretty good idea.
I have (most unfortunately) developed a taste for staying up late to watch movies.
I have developed also, the ability to write news stories with more fluidity.
I am learning to listen to myself--how many times I speak in a conversation more than whomever I'm speaking to.
I'm learning to control my desire to be accepted.
I'm learning to listen to others and remember what they say.
I'm learning how to be an effective reporter.

I've taken this break to write. It helps me focus if I take a break or two while doing my homework.
Tomorrow is another Production Night for the Crusader staff, so I'll probably stay up till all hours of the night, but I don't mind because I have no classes on Thursdays.

I've been wondering several things lately, but to save space, I'm going to list them as my top questions for the month of September:
The American Culture--what securities does the Digital Age bring?
The End Times--what is the nature of the society in which we live?
Why do the "good people" die first?
Do I really learn in school?

I will probably devote a post to each question, maybe.
Also, thanks to Dr. Patton, the words I have learned this month are:
1. imperturbable (17 Sept)--adj. not easily disturbed, agitated or disconcerted.
2. derided (17 Sept)--to make contemptuous fun of; mock
3. pontificate (29 Sept)-- to perform ecclesiastical rites or ceremonies as a pontiff 2. to talk in an arrogant or self-important manner.

Hmm. So that looks like everything I can write, I guess. The joy (and pain) of life is that it's so intricate, I couldn't possibly list everything I've learned this month, everything I've been wondering, or even everything I've improved in my life. It amazes me that each person's life meets with others at different points along the way, linking person to person, network to network, creating the fabric of reality and interaction as we know it. Thoughts like this remind me how insignificant I am, but help me understand my place and my role--should I try to fit in to society, or is it better to spread out?

Good bye, September.
Have a wonderful evening, everyone. Keep safe.

Reflections

2008-09-11T17:59:00.003-04:00

Today is September 11th, 2008. It is a day of reflection.

Even if you do not know anyone personally who was affected by the tragedy that happened seven years ago, it is nonetheless important to reflect. In an age where instant gratification is the norm, and receiving information from somewhere far away is commonplace, the effects of the world in which we live leave an imprint on us all the same. Many, if not all, of you reading will be able to identify exactly where you were and what you were doing on this day when you heard the news. This is a definite impression.
Televisions and radio footage of an event--any event--can give us the impression that we live in a bubble. While this is true, it results two ways: one, we only pay attention to the bubble in which we live, and two, things that happen outside our bubble may affect us for a little while, but eventually, life will continue its course as though nothing had happened. I'm not saying that we should live in the past; this is unhealthy and unpractical, but it is important to remember such things.

We should remember why we live where we do. I, personally, did not fight in the American Revolution, or help word the Bill of Rights, and yet, I share the benefits of these events. What have I ever done to deserve these benefits? Nothing. I was just born here.
Our troops understand this: there are some things worth fighting for, and others for which you will die. Do your best, and that's all anyone can ask of you.

No one likes war. War is terrible, and comes at the price of human lives. It's awful, but if a war back in the 1700s gave me the ability to express myself freely, then was that war necessary? That depends on whether I would be willing to relinquish that right.

A lot of my generation are opposed to war at all costs. This is very admirable. However, it is not practical or logical. If I seek to be a peaceable person for the rest of my life, that personal decision will not necessarily protect me from the more bellicose. It is essential to realize that people's theory of life is what dictates their actions. If a group of people strongly believe that their deity has called them to annihilate and repress other groups that don't share the same view, we can rely on that first group to act according to their personal theology. As individuals, it is impossible to single-handedly change another individual's philosophy of life. As humans, we tend to collect a collage of different ideas and interpret them in ways that resonate most with, what ends up being, our personal philosophy. The terrorists on those flights seven years ago strongly believed that they were doing what is right in accordance with what they believed. Thus, all of the people on those planes, regardless of whether they were peaceful people or not, they were the victims. This is what deserves our reflection: how war is terrible, but those who believe in war will find ways to bring it about.

I commend heros like Todd Beamer, and other nameless individuals who decided on the difference between reaction and action. Even though they knew the chances of survival were slim, they fought before going down. What bravery!

I pray for our troops in Iraq. I'm sure it's not easy fighting a war, but it is cause for reflection nonetheless.

Going with the ebb and flow...

2008-09-08T18:17:00.003-04:00

Whew. What a week I've had! What a week!! I know everyone's dying to hear my tale...

So I finally got my computer, and I must be honest, Macs are cooler than any other computer. Hands down. However, I'm still a PC person at heart--some comforts just die hard, I guess.

Not only did I get my computer, but I got all of the four different software I needed to install on it, along with a FREE* printer and a FREE* iPod Touch. In addition, I have my CDs that I kept with me, as well as all the information from my old computer stored on my 2GB flash drive, my digital camera installation CD, and my printer CD. Needless to say, I spent the entire day last Thursday just inserting CDs and CD-ROMs into the Mac to bring it up to speed. I have been trying to get all of my information on the computer ever since, and it's a little slow-going. To top it off, it seems as though my 2GB flash drive isn't Mac-compatible, so I've been emailing myself all of my documents from my dorm's computer lab on the third floor...

It's raining outside now, when it was chilly in the morning, muggy and hot around midday, and now it's cold and wet. I just don't understand MI weather. It messes me up: I think it'll be the typical fall day, so I'll wear my numerous layers. MI weather dictates, however, that unless all four seasons can pass within the space of one day, it's not true MI weather. That said, we'll most likely get snow in the beginning of October. Speaking of absurdities, the ice cream truck has had the audacity to drive down the street just now.

I have been in and out of everything this past week, getting my computer and effects, going to my classes, and trying to find good school materials for the cheapest prices. I'm sharing what books I won't need, but am trying to buy what I can from students, since their prices are generally lower than what I've found online or on the used books in the school bookstore. I stayed up till 3 am this morning trying to get homework done. I didn't get much done over the weekend because I didn't have the books for those classes, and everyone who did went home for the weekend. I will finish buying my books tomorrow, though.

I'm taking a very fascinating class called "An Introduction to Communication Theory." It is more or less of a theory class on how communication has affected societies, and ultimately the world, through the communication technologies. Like I said, fascinating. Dr. Patton really has a way with words, and he generally acts out many of his concepts for class (he's the director of the Drama Dept, so any class with Patton is engaging).
Today we discussed 1960s University of Toronto professor Marshall McLuhan and his theory that significant scientific and social changes of history were not necessarily dictated by science or the society itself, but by communication. The beginning of history and peoples is known (according to McLuhan) as the "Tribal Age" where society and people relied primarily on their sense of hearing to gain information; the "Age of Literacy" where, once the phonetic alphabet was created, the average people learned to read by that phonetic alphabet and retreated to a slightly more individualistic culture because they were able to read for themselves; the "Print Age" during which reading material was mass-produced, resulting (possibly) in an upswing of both nationalism and individualism, as books were printed in one language but many dialects; and the "Electronic Age" which is essentially an era of instant and endless communication, renewing the ancient survival senses of both sound and touch all in one. With all these eras, there is an invention/discovery of some kind that completely revolutionizes history: after the "Tribal Age" it was the invention and collective agreement on the symbols that comprise various phonetic alphabets; after the "Age of Literacy" it was Gutenburg's printing press in 1455 A.D.; and after the "Print Age" it was the telegraph in the 1830s. McLuhan maintained nonetheless that with each brilliant new discovery/invention, something was lost and something was gained. The price tag for the invention of phonetic alphabets was that although people could now read information, they no longer relied on storytellers or advanced forms of memorization because writing could be better preserved. Such "price tags" are similar at the other stages as well.

It's food for thought, I guess.
Well, I'll probably write more later, eventually...

*With the purchase of the computer

Spelling and Grammar

2008-08-29T13:50:00.003-04:00

I'm here in the Comm Suite at Spring Arbor and I'm copy editing. Well, at least, I was for a while...

It's amazing to me how you can hear people speak through their written works. I'm sure everyone is somewhat familiar with this: you'll pick up a letter from your grandfather to your grandmother, or see a birthday card from your mom, and when you read what is written, you'll hear the inflection of the voice, the subtle pauses between words, the tone in which they speak, the rhythmic rise and fall of speech as it flows on paper...

It seems it a shame to read through an entire flow on paper, but not to enjoy--to correct.

Obviously, for the paper to become a credible source of information, it's important to keep the writing of said paper to a standard that anyone and everyone can read. Still, I plan on getting a copy of this issue once it's printed so I can enjoy it, but the journalist inside me will never let me read in peace. Once an editor, always an editor, I say.

More and more, I am able to appreciate the vast and sometimes subtle differences between the speech of one and the speech of another. The way people pronounce their "R's" or their "W's" or the "th" sound or the "d" sound. It strikes me that language is nothing more than sounds connected a certain way. The result is words. This is probably really obvious to some, but the fact that just now, I've come to appreciate it, it stands to reason that I've also obviously overlooked this tiny detail. Funny how that happens, isn't it?

But as I say, I'm reading through different stories of staff members, and I can hear the voices of those I know, but for those I don't, I make a guess based on how they speak about their subject. Some people (I'm afraid I'm included in this number) generally have a very pompous manner in which they write. Very formal, very clear, etc. Some are more passive, almost as though they've written the story and are inviting your opinion on what they've written.

I'm striving to keep this blog informal, as though speaking to a friend over lunch, instead of writing to friends over cyberspace. I want this blog to be easy to read, and I want you, the reader, to be able to hear my voice when you read. I think the concept of language is such a profound thing, I want everyone to be able to appreciate it for the miracle that it is.

Have a wonderful day!

Rumors and News

2008-08-27T14:13:00.001-04:00

So it came to my attention that news (as in newspaper, news media news) starts as rumors.
Huh.
It makes sense, I guess, that "news" isn't written until it is first a rumor that peaks interest. If this is true, it follows that all "news" is just what one person heard from another that somehow made its way down the chain to the editor of the newspaper, who decided it should be further investigated.

The good news is that the rumors aren't the main thing reported (usually). It takes a nosy and slightly cynical reporter to find the nuggets of truth within the stew.

So, I guess that means that "rumors" are heretofore described as being founded in truth, but shrouded in fiction, whereas "news" is described as being founded in truth and bearing witness to that truth. However, when "news" is involved, is it safe to say that the stories tell the Truth? On the finite level of humans, there is an Absolute Truth, and Relevant Truth...I guess Absolute Truth is what cannot be changed, whereas Relevant Truth is that which appears unchangeable at a certain time in history from the vantange point of any given finite human being. Being unchangeable makes something a Truth, but being changeable to one and unchangeable to another makes it Relevant.

Hmm.
More later...

Hello!

2008-08-26T13:35:00.000-04:00

Well hello, everyone. I've decided to start blogging so I can keep in touch with the many people I know, and hopefully bridge the gap between homes and countries.

I'll probably write more later..