The Power of Choice vs. Influence

Good evening, Dear Reader. I would like to make a case both for and against Influence as it interacts with my newfound Power of Choice.

For example: Obviously, the Influence of other people in my life will have a direct effect on my choices. However, others' Influence should not be used as a scapegoat for my personal choices. The Power of Choice remains with me, and cannot be parted from me thus.

Way back in second grade, I remember it was popular to say "The Devil made me do it," in normal, everyday conversation of...well, second-graders.

"Johnny, why did you chase Amy?"

"The Devil made me do it!"

In hindsight, because we were young enough not to know too many swear words or curses, blaming an invisible object deflected responsibility from ourselves (especially when we weren't sure the type of attention we would receive for an action). Besides, blaming the Devil was certainly tantamount to actually cussing, therefore, we all felt very much grown up.

Truth be told, Dear Reader, I've often disliked the Power of Choice because it means if I am wrong, it will be on my head. I don't like to be wrong much. Hence the dislike. But, I don't have to let others Influence how I will choose. I can, but I don't have to.

I've realized lately how much my taste in music has been Influenced this summer, what with spending time with my best friend, with my godmother, and at the radio station. I now recognize at least one hundred new songs that I didn't know this time last year. What is it about music, that it can make and break people all over the world?? Does the music I listen to have a direct Influence on how I Choose to dress myself? how I Choose to speak? how I Choose to act? how I Choose to live? Some people think yes; it has often been promoted by these people how suicidal teenagers will kill themselves after blaring music with suggestive lyrics. Unfortunately, I have heard far too often this same story, and how the musicians of such lyrics should be ashamed of themselves for introducing these ideas at all.

Personally, I don't think such lyrics should be made public because they are suggestive. But at the same time, I know that those lyrics sell. Friends who listen to this type of music tell me that the artist is "expressing what I feel" through the song. Regardless, it remains the sole Choice of the teenager what he will do with the suggestions he is given in any type of music to which he listens. Especially when he tells me that he prefers to "just listen to the music." This is a mindless choice. Mindless in this sense meaning that Teenager Bob refuses to use his own grey matter, but a choice nonetheless.

In the same way, Influence (especially in music) can be a positive thing! How many times have I heard people say that they "love this song" on the radio because it makes their day better? And it is Influence that is single-handedly responsible for personality/behavioral changes in recovering addicts of various vices!

There is an Aesop's Fable about a crane and a flock of other birds. The Crane is a nice bird, and the Farmer and his family like the bird and tell him he is welcome to their house anytime. But the flock of Birds are unkind and destroy the Farmer's crops and his fishing net. The other Birds tell the Crane he can be in their group, and the Crane reluctantly agrees, and helps the Birds destroy crops and farming tools. The Farmer goes out to throw a net on the mischief-makers, and catches the Crane in the net. The Crane tries to plead his way out, but the Farmer tells the Crane sadly that he is the company he keeps.

It is up to the Crane to Choose how to behave: accept the kindness and friendship of a respected Farmer, or gain the acceptance and camaraderie of his peers who want nothing but trouble for others.

In short, the Devil can't make me do a thing I don't already choose to do. I can make my own choices and even choosing not to act is an act in itself.

Good night, Dear Reader. I hope you get a restful sleep tonight.

The Power of Choice

My dear friends, family, acquaintances, the occasional web-surfer; YOU, Dear Reader,

I would like to write on a very perplexing subject. I wanted to write this on my actual birthday, but what with activities and surprises...well, I'm sure you understand. I have recently come of age. And so the obvious question: What do I choose as my lifestyle?

I've had many mixed reviews over the course of my birthday, some urging me to try alcohol and such while others warn me against it. Some tell me that these were the best years of their lives, while others caution me about having too much fun. It would be easy to say I would rather choose the path straight down the middle, but then it begs the question: where is the middle? However, this is my time to choose; the Power of Choice stays with me.

What a funny thing Choice is. We can often dress it up to look as though we had nothing to do with it. It still remains our Choice. Right now, I feel that there are so many Choices, but my mom assures me the most pressing to me at this moment will all dissipate in a few years, only to be replaced with other choices.

Sometimes, I hate choices. I dislike that either way I choose, I may let someone down, or lower their expectations of me. I'm a people-pleaser. However, I'm learning more and more that as infrequently as I make choices for myself, it allows someone else to take over a little part of my life. Perhaps, if I feel pressured in any way at all, it's because I've let so many other people have a say in what I do. If I don't take responsibility for my actions, then someone else will be blamed for them. Why should I surrender my entire life over to other people just to avoid making choices??

The greatest thing about turning 21 is that I am no longer limited to certain things because of my age. If I am ever out with friends, I can take responsibility for my actions in choosing to accept a drink, or choosing to deny it. For the most part, I will enjoy knowing I can choose whichever option I want. I have that power, that Choice.

I say it is a Power; well, it is! And yet, think of all the choices I have made in a day without giving them a second thought! Some people try to use other "influencing" factors to get out of making even the smallest choices, while others will use (or sometimes, overuse) those same influencing factors to get what they want out of life.

Here's what I see about choice: depending on the day, the hour, and general daily energy of a person, Choice is one part logic to two parts emotion, to one part reflex. Even the most logical person has some hidden meaning behind his decision, especially if the deciding factor triggers a past triumph or failure. Equally, in decision-making, emotion and reflex are almost completely attached to one another, and thus vary the most in this equation.

I have the Power, the Power to Choose. No one can tell me what I will choose. They can tell me how they would choose, and they can tell what they think I should choose, but I still actually choose in the end. What a gift!

I will write more on this later because this post is long enough!

Good night!

Preservation of Innocence

Okay, so I obviously didn't come back after dinner. Hopefully, I've given you plenty of time to digest the first part of this thought, Dear Reader. Thus, I return with the promised factors of "Rules and their Influence" and "Actions vs. Reactions".

RULES AND THEIR INFLUENCE:

Reading in the book of Romans of the Bible, Paul says:

"Now we know that whatever the law says, it says to those who are under the law, so that every mouth may be silenced and the whole world held accountable to God. Therefore no one will be declared righteous in his sight by observing the law; rather, through the law we became conscious of sin (Rom. 3:19-20, NIV)."

Previously in this book, Paul was both justifying God's sovereignty and his right to punish. It strikes me as interesting, Dear Reader, that Paul doesn't consider the "law" as a burden, necessarily, but as a measuring stick by which one discovers good vs. evil.

Object Image:

Okay, growing up in my family, there are lots of things that were just expected of us--doing the dishes, asking permission to stay at a girlfriend's house for the night, calling when out later than expected--these were things I was used to. When I entered junior high and high school, suddenly these "expectations" became "rules", so named by my peers who insisted that they were "free" to go to a friend's house for the night without asking, or they didn't have to call because their moms just "didn't care". My peers came to pity me for the vast amount of "rules" under which I was allegedly suffocating. The thing is, I didn't see these as "rules" until I realized that very few of my peers shared the same upbringing. Thus, it was because of these boundaries that I became conscious of "Right" and "Wrong" in my house.

So, logically, "rules" have two effects: a positive effect and a negative effect. If, with our imaginary village (let's call it 'Stickville'), everyone grows up with the same rules, Right and Wrong in Stickville will be very clear. Anyone who disobeys rules like "Do not murder" will obviously be rejecting the law, and thus be guilty of a crime. This shows that the law was created to remind people of the potential 'evil/Wrong'. If, in Stickville, everyone grows up under each individual family's personal interpretation of the rules, Right and Wrong will be undefined. They will still be known, but they will be undefined. For the sake of argument, let us say that in order for our Stickville to retain its innocence, all residents must abide by the exact same law, and the exact same interpretation of said law.

Sorry, Dear Reader, but I'm tired. I didn't think this thought would take me so long...I'll have to finish it later.

Good night!

Running out of sorts

This is an expression my mom uses every now and then. I don't think it's an actual idiom that people use around here, but my mom uses it nonetheless. I feel it very accurately describes my life from the last post to the present: AAAAHHH!!!!

Just had to clear my system. I'm great now.

Well, of the more random things I have to ponder, Dear Reader, I still have one more reflection from Kuna Island that I still haven't shared! My apologies! Next time, I'll try harder to keep my promises I make online. I will end up writing two posts today, if I can.

ORIGINAL STATEMENT:

"The Village"--When we were in Granada, Nicaragua at the end of the Nica trip, two students rented the movie "The Village" by M. Night Shamalan (sp?) from the front desk of our hostel to play on the television in the lounge. This movie presented me with an interesting idea that I have seen here as well: innocence. Can it be preserved if the community is separated from the rest of the world? In the movie, the community still had some problems. Here, the Kuna say that violence does not exist on their island. This also makes me wonder about rules and laws: how much is too much? And where to personal rights come in? Should the cut-off community listen only to its own rules in order to preserve the innocence, thus negating the rules of the world completely? What about humanity? Although we often have perfect conditions in which to preserve said innocence, would it still survive? It seems to me that our choices and actions would make innocence harder to preserve.

CONTINUATION OF THEME:

First off, any poor unfortunate soul who has not seen M. Night Shamalan's "The Village" needs to go right now to the nearest movie rental and rent it. Seriously. It is a thriller about a village in the middle of the woods, and everybody is afraid to go into the woods. (SPOILER) It becomes apparent that the creatures/monsters that live in the woods and terrify the people are really the elders dressed up in costume. They do this to keep the younger generation from falling back into the world. It's fascinating. I wouldn't ruin it like that, but I need the basis for this post, sorry. Still, go and rent it. I would buy it, but I know intellectual thrillers aren't for everyone.

So, the Kuna and Innocence. This was a purely objective reflection; the only way to continue the discussion would be based on personal perspective rather than facts or statistics. Therefore, the question is simple: If cut off from the "world" and placed in a closed environment, would the Innocence of Humanity survive? I'll make this harder by posing two likely paths of thought: If Humanity is inherently good, then Innocence will survive longer. And: If Humanity is inherently evil, then Innocence will not survive long at all.

I personally feel that every human is a little of both, like the whole ying and yang deal. Perhaps I am indeed an idealist, but I find it impossible to believe that even the hardest criminal in the world lacks a soft spot. It may not be big enough for anyone to reach, but it is there nonetheless.

However, once we have decided whether or not Humanity is inherently good or evil, the next question to ponder is which idea will spread faster, the good, or the evil. If, in our imaginary village, there are 7 'good' people and 1 'evil' person, and we have decided that good spreads faster than evil, then we can likely assume that the 'evil' person will, in some way, be converted after spending his life with the 7 'good'. Now let's flip it: If there are 7 'good' people and 1 'evil' person, and we have decided that evil spreads faster than good, then we can assume that the one evil person will have infected at least more than half of the 7 'good' after having spent his life with them.

More to come: Rules and their influence, and Actions vs. Reactions.

Dinner!

Notes II

ORIGINAL STATEMENT:

Skirts/dresses--I love my sarong, and I use it every day. I still believe that pants are more practical, but I like skirts. Why do women use pants to work? Was it the the women's liberation that started this practice?

CONTINUATION OF THEME:

Truth be told, I can do so much in a skirt that I've always done wearing pants. It depends on the skirt, apparently, but they are really versatile. I can wear a casual skirt, change my shirt/blouse, and the skirt becomes business casual, or even semi-formal. Jeans can never be semi-formal--unless they are in pristine condition.

Perhaps you, Dear Reader, are familiar with the pictures of Rosie the Riveter? From what I've learned in U.S. History classes, the picture of a woman wearing overalls and performing a man's job while retaining her femininity was very appealing to women who were only house-makers up to that point. Once war broke out and the States joined in, the men were off fighting, but there were still many jobs to be done. The only resource available to employers at that time were women, who were strong because they raised households; women, who were strong because they were facing a lonely future until their husbands and brothers and sons came home.

The thing with the Women's Lib is this: the movement started (as they all do) because there was a definite need for change toward women's rights. Before the 40s and 50s, women were primarily devoted to house care. They cleaned. They cooked. They dealt with the children. They mended. They tried to make the husband happy. They tried to keep their kids from getting spoiled. Women had a heavy time of it. However, because of this stereotype, women weren't expected to achieve much else. Once they started working the men's jobs, they had to change their a-line skirts for pairs of overalls. This gave them more freedom.

You know, I really like a-line skirts. I agree with why the movement started. However, I humbly submit my thoughts on feminism today: If the movement started so that women such as I could go into the world and pursue any type of education, job, office, etc. that she wanted and not be told by the society that the said activity was not suited to her gender, then if I, as a woman who believes in choice, plan to be a home-maker in this world of business, I believe I should have that choice. Feminism was not started to control the world, but to create a semblance of equality. Will we ever be "equal" with men? I doubt it. But that doesn't mean it's entirely impossible.

Regardless, I really like skirts. Then I can be a woman who chooses because she has the power to make a choice, and not a woman who chooses because she thinks others have made the choice for her.

Good night, dear friends!

Notes

So, I finally received the journal I wrote in for the Kuna trip, and wow!! I wrote so much. There is a section where I thought up topics I wanted to write about when I got back, but because I had to turn in that journal for a grade, I forgot what the topics were until I received it again and began to look through it. That said, I'll do my best to translate what I think I was thinking at the time... Also, I'll probably post one a day, just so I don't load down the family and friends who want a quick read.

ORIGINAL STATEMENT:

Poverty-- I have seen photos of people who live in houses like the Kuna with the label of "poverty" under the picture. The Kuna--they choose to live this way. This is not poverty. Also, why is it that we believe everyone needs to be as rich as we are? Although we have our riches and our privileges, we need much to maintain them. The Kunas work out of sheer necessity.

CONTINUATION OF THEME:

I believe I've already written about this (and if I say the exact same thing again, I apologize, although this is a point I feel needs to be stressed as much as possible). However, the fact remains: our greed and love of material wealth has very obviously caused the economic downfall that people in the United States are currently experiencing. Some have worked so hard for their futures, only to find it's the present that's falling apart; Others have worked so hard for their present, only to find they have no future. To look at it this way leaves me, Dear Reader, with only one option: our manner of thinking (that is to say, our manner of logic according to fluctuations of less stable factors like the economy and human nature) must have a flaw. Consider: If we believe that we are dealing our lives correctly in the world during this age at this time, then the world should either continue getting better, or should stay the same. If the world becomes worse off while we believe we are dealing our lives correctly, then something must be faulty with the original logic. This is how science class works. Make a hypothesis, experiment, draw a conclusion, and adjust your point of view on possibility. It's also "Cognitive Dissonance" all over again.

I would just like to add that I am not at all against hard work. I think that working hard is a very admirable thing to do, and I wish more people did it. My point is that our balance of work and play is off. If we work to sustain a perfect lifestyle, we may never enjoy our lifestyle to the fullest. The question comes down, not to work itself, but necessity versus greed. If we work out of greed, we will never have enough. If we work out of necessity, we will always have just enough.

This is a lesson I learned from the Kunas I lived with. What an honor to be brought into their world.